Renaissance

Sam. Hello and welcome to open with me, Patsy and Angie. And the first thing we'd like to say to all our listeners is Happy New year, welcome to 2019 and this week's episode of our show, which is called Renaissance. And what are we talking about this week, Ange? What we did over Christmas Really? Well, what did you do over Christmas? Well, as you know, Patsy, Christmas is always a fraught time for me because it, it's actually a bittersweet time of year for me because it reminds me of all the people I've lost and also all the chaotic things that I had in my life. So I, I don't normally celebrate Christmas in a sort of Judeo Christian, biblical sense. Do you celebrate any aspects of it? Did you celebrate any aspects of it, such as, you know, the lighting of candles or having meals and drinks with family and friends? Well, as you know, I'm estranged from my family. However, what I do like about that season that's just gone is on the 21st of December, it's the shortest day of the year. So I always think, thank God we've made, I've made another year because all the days begin to get longer and I, and I love that. To me it's like, well, on to the next year, I can start again. It's like new beginnings, new exciting things to come. I don't actually look forward to the Christmas shopping and things like that. I just think it's an utter waste of time. I just think, why are people so brainwashed into this Judeo Christian construct and pressurizing themselves on buying things that they don't know and sending Christmas cards and all of that crap? Excuse my French, but lots of people do enjoy it. I mean, so, so what you're saying is, is that for you, you think the new year spiritually or the equinox starts more on December 21st than it does on January? Well, astrologically, that's correct, yeah. Yeah. So why do you think people do celebrate Christmas? What do you think the driving motivations are? I think it's the, normally it's the shortest day of the year. So around the 21st, you just want to go to bed and you want to eat more and be surrounded by a fire or people that are around. I mean, don't forget it's a man made construct and it's been going for millennia. So, so normally you're gonna be huddled around a fire and eat rich foods or things that you've pickled or cured hams and things like that. So that's why we have that celebration. It's only when the Victorians came along and they invented Christmas as we know it. I mean, the Christmas tree and all that, that was actually a German import. So what you're really saying is the bits you don't like about Christmas are the commercial aspects, but the actual. The pagan qualities of gathering food and waiting for the winter months with hibernation to be over and then going into spring, those aspects of it you do. The pagan elements of it, you do appreciate. Well, I follow the seasons, you know, because life is about seasons and cycles. So for me, I find on that that is very positive. But I've seen the damage the pressures of trying to have a happy Christmas does. In what way? Well, it's so much pressure for people. I mean, a lot of people are very lonely at Christmas, as you know, I volunteer my time for Samaritans. You know, people are very suicidal over that period. You know, people's sense of loneliness and isolation comes to the fore. So that's what I do because it makes me feel good that I'm giving back. Yeah, yeah. But was it always like that? I mean, what about Christmas when you were growing up, on a. It was a picture postcard, it looked gorgeous. However, I saw the impact it had on my mother and father because they pressurised themselves to provide a perfect Christmas. And don't forget, we had people because we lived in a big house, we had a big Christmas tree, people came to visit and all sorts. All the pressures of providing food and the bedding and the sleeping arrangements and all of that. And I saw the stress my mother would get into and the hysteria. And as you know, my relationship with my parents was very distant or absent. So Christmas to me was my time of retreating into fantasy world. And that's what I used to do. I used to sit under the Christmas tree and look at Twinkle and I used to love all that. And then, of course, we had the cat and the dog and it was happy. The only thing I looked forward to was actually receiving a presentation. And how did your mother cope with those pressures? How, you know, how do you think people cope with, you know, the festive season? That's just gone. We're now in January and everybody's completely frazzled. They've overeaten, they've over drunk, they've overspent, they're detoxing. Oh, don't get me started on that, the diet. But is it something that you think you have to go through? You go through all that overeating and then you get to January, and it's. You then try and start renewing and making resolutions and doing all that sort of thing. I think every morning you wake up, Patsy one has a renewal. It's a rebirth. The fact that we come alive again and we wake up is a miracle in itself. So every morning that you wake up is a new beginning, number one. Number two, why would you inflict that stress and trauma onto yourself? As everyone who knows our show, they know I'm all about living it and keeping it real and living your authenticity. Why would I chain myself to an archaic construct that's not even real? I mean, it's, it's so. It's. It's an anathema for me, complete and utter anathema. And I just think to people, why would you do that to yourself? I think it's because everybody wants to belong, isn't it? Everybody wants to feel as though they're part of things that are going on, that they want to join in. Well, all I've got to say to you, this is the way I deal with Christmas. Yeah. And everything else. And. And New Year's, another one which I can't stand as well. So in this, in this new year, we're in 2019, what are your resolutions? Can I ask you what your resolutions are? I don't do resolutions, as you know, because I can't stand it. I think for me it's about experiencing things, traveling more, doing, taking things off the bucket list before I pass on to the. The other world, shall we say? And what, what, what are those things? Well, some of them are sexual, so I won't actually say that there can't be any sexual things left that you surely have yet to accomplish. I just. Are there? I mean, I'm asking. I'm asking, actually, genuine question. I have done quite a few. Yes, you're correct, I have. But there's a. There's the odd one or two I wish to try out, and they are. I'm not divulging. I don't think it's fair. Oh, come on. No, no, no. I'm sure our listeners are just, you know, absolutely waiting with bated breath. I know I am. I am. I'm just wondering. One of my ones is actually to wear a bodysuit and look like a mummy and have be so you can't see anything in. All the holes are cut out in the specific places and have sex with anonymous people one after the other. And what would it be made of this bodysuit? Oh, so. So it'd be like a Condom, shall we say? I see. And is this something that you are going to accomplish within 2019, would you say? I may well do. I've got the latex bodysuit already. I had it made and measured because, you know, you have to have it made for you. Yeah. So I've got the equipment, but I haven't got the participants just yet. But I'm working on it. Right, okay. And is there anything else? I want to travel more and I also want to leave England or I want to have a different base. I may move to Paris. So you're saying that you are hoping to travel more and that you want to experience different things, and those are the things that people should be aiming for rather than experiences. Yeah, rather than the traditional ones, which were, oh, I've got to go to the. I've got to join. Join the gym. I've got to lose weight, I've got to eat a healthy diet. I mean, those resolutions are made over and over and over again. And guess what? They all. They do. Yeah. Because I think people set themselves just impossible, impossible targets. And the worst thing I hate is how much money am I going to earn this year? Or what am I. What stuff am I going to get a new car or a new something? It's like. It's implying that there's a void that needs filling. It's like, don't you get it yet? It's an inside job. It's about the memories you make and it's about experiences that fulfill your life. When you have your life review, when you pass over and you're looking back over your life, you don't look at the things that you've got. You look at the experiences, the emotional experiences that one has. So you're saying in essence, that you think listeners should concentrate more on living, feeling. Living. Yeah, living experience. Rather than. Rather than stuff. Rather than having stuff. Yes, Whatever that is. Whatever that is. Yeah, exactly. So that's just my way of looking at it. And I just like to challenge myself more. And how will you be challenging yourself more? Surgery, as you know. More surgery. I always have surgery. So what are your surgical. I haven't decided just yet, but I am already booked in to have more surgery at the end of this month. Can you give us a clue as to what that might be? Around my chest area? I'm having my breast implants changed. Yes. Because they have to be changed. So that's another process. And also got to have an operation on my feet because I've got terrible bone issues going on which need to be repaired. So I've got operations to look forward to or dread. The operation itself is fine. It's the recovery which is a nightmare. And have you found that that gets trickier as you get older? You get more fearful as you get older every time you have an anesthetic. However, when you're surrounded by people that you know and trust, and I have a whole collection of team because I go privately, it lessens the scariness of it all, because you know what you're going to expect, which is a good thing. If you gonna have plastic surgery or have any form of modification that requires surgical intervention, do your research. What if you had to give our listeners one piece of advice for the New Year going forward? Is there anything that you would want to. Want to seize the day and go for it? Seize the day and go for it. Well, I think that's our. Well, that's one of our messages for our listeners in this episode. Again, if you would like to respond to anything that you've heard in the show, drop us an email@presentersomensradiostation.com or tweet us @womensradiostn. We'll be back after this break. Welcome to women's radio station, the voice of women worldwide. This is Women's Radio Station. You're listening to Adriel Price with Kitchen Sink Spirituality. It's Anna Kennedy talking all things autism and my guest today is Karen. Welcome to future Classical Woman Awards with me, Stefania Passamonte on women's radio station. Women's Radio Station, we want to hear from you. I listen to Women's radio station Women. The possibilities are endless. That's what makes us different. Hi, I'm Liz Van Linden, a UK travel consultant for Hazelmere Travel. People come to me as they want unique experiences and a personalised service. This happens from the moment that they enquire till they come back home. I work with luxury tour operators. You can contact me on 078-254-4122 and Liz spelt L I S hazelmayetravel.co.uk hi, I'm Mariam Jamaux and I'm the founder of WCAN, a young social enterprise ensuring an increase in employment progression and retention of black women in the corporate world. 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We would love you to join our mailing list or become a sponsor or just buy a ticket to one of our shows. The website is www.germanstreettheatre.co.uk. Women's Radio Station is a not for profit, community interest company. Supporting women is our passion. We're currently welcoming donations to help towards our costs to keep this important initiative alive. To donate, simply head to our website. Every little will help. Sa. Welcome back to Open. I'm Patsy. And I'm Angie and we are starting our first show of 2019 with a topic of renewal and renaissance. Well, Patsy, darling, how was your Christmas? My Christmas was fabulous. I love Christmas. But then, you know that I'm always. Oh, she loves a bit of glitter. I'm always happy to join in with whatever's going on. You know, if I go to a party and people are taking their clothes off, then I'm. I'm in there with the best of them. And don't we all know it. So, yeah, I had a. I had a great Christmas. I usually spend Christmas in London and as listeners will know if they've been following our show, I don't have any family, so usually we have a collection of wonderful friends and waifs and strays, I think, but not, you know, not in a. In a derogatory way, just people who, for one reason or another, are around and about and we have them all in and feed them, feed them in excess of food and drink until they fall over and then we roll them out of the door at the end of the day. So it's usually very jolly. And my poor husband does all the cooking and who does the cleaning? Well, I. Well, yeah, well, that's my job. And this year I spent Christmas with a friend in the country, so, yeah, it was absolutely lovely. Was it different this time? Was it more quiet? What was it? No, it was Wonderful. It was a different collection of people in a different location, but that's how we do it. And I always have a. I always just love it. I just always have a wonderful time. So we all know that you come from a Muslim background. You were adopted by a British mother. So what was your Christmas like growing up? Christmas growing up was pretty weird because obviously I was living in a Muslim household, which, again, if listeners have been following the show, which I hope they have, they will know about. So we didn't celebrate Christmas with my biological parents, but obviously with my adopted mother. And you'll know that, as I've said before, we were in one room of the house, and in that room it was Christmas. I know that sounds completely odd, but in that room there was a tree, there were decorations, we had presents. I remember waking up on Christmas morning and my mother would always have drawn me. My adopted mother, she'd always have drawn me like a little treasure map. So there'd be some. Some crosses. You know, I'd have two or three presents at the most. And you'd have to follow the clues to find your presence on this treasure map. And it was one of the most pleasurable things I remember about being a kid at Christmas. Looking forward, what was your most treasured, treasured present as a kid, I think, was when I got my first portable music device. Which was. Which was a Walkman. Yeah. And I remember it was about the size of a house brick. You know, they were when they first came out. It's the size of a house brick, and you could put a cassette in it, and it had a radio on it. And it was just. I just was so happy because the dogs do dance, as we would say. And I think before that, when I was. When I was very little, my. My favorite ever present was probably a kaleidoscope, one of those things that you look through and you turn the end and it all, you know, it all changes and, well, I don't know, something I was given. So those were my. My two favorite presents. But it was quite odd because in this room it was Christmas, and in the rest of the house, the rest of the house it wasn't. Didn't you find it challenging or anything? I don't remember finding it challenging because I think as a child, you adapt to whatever circumstances present themselves. On a clinical level, you just find it quite schizophrenic. I think you're absolutely right. I think schizophrenic is a really good way of describing it. It was schizophrenic And I think that's why now, that explains a lot. Whatever. Whatever situation I'm in, I just adapt. I kind of go with the flow because it's just what my childhood was like. You were. You were one child in one part of the house. You were another child in another part of the house. And I sort of flitted between the two, really, without much consciousness. So don't Muslims actually do anything over the festive period? No, because it's not a Muslim festival. Oh, well. And I think that was one of the sadnesses, really, because sometimes I would go to church with my mother on Christmas morning and she would always be very sad because she'd say to me as we were walking back, you know, everybody else will be going back to their Christmas lunch now. And we'd go back and, you know, it'd be Chapattis and Dahl. So it was just really weird. And what about the Queen's message at 3 o'? Clock? My mother was always a great fan of watching that, and I still. I will still watch it now because I think it's part of the day. It's as much part of the day as. As Morecambe and Wise or the eastenders omniscience or the wizard of Oz. And all those things are part of what you come to expect on Christmas Day. Now, Patsy. Resolutions, my dear. Resolutions. Oh, my goodness. Now, that's a tricky one. I tend to nowadays make resolutions that I know I can keep, like. So my resolutions for this year are to drink more gin and wear more hats. And why those two? Because they're achievable. Oh, so you basically set yourself resolutions that you can easily achieve. Yes. That's hardly a resolution. That's the downfall of lots of people when they make resolutions that they have these unachievable targets that you then can't live up to. And then you kind of. You're very hard on yourself because you haven't. You haven't reached the. The targets that. So what was your resolution last year? My resolution, apart from being with me, my resolution last year, I think, was to focus more on my relationship at home, which I tried hard to do. So you achieve that one? I hope so. Well, I'm gonna ask the partner when I see him next. What would you like to share with our listeners about coping strategies throughout the festive season that's just passed and what to prepare for next year? I think it is. Again, it's to breathe, it's to relax. I mean, that just sounds very glib and I don't mean it to, but I think that people heap pressure on them to be perfect, to cook the perfect meal, to buy the perfect presents, to decorate the house so it's beautif beautiful. And they're all things that if you take a step back, as you were saying, I think in the first half, it isn't something that is important. I don't think people judge you on those things or I'd like to think that they don't. Well, I mean, looking. What, What I've. I've come to realize is because I'm. I'm. I don't have children and I'm not married. That makes it even more complicated. And don't forget, today's society is a bit more broken down now. There's more single people living out there and we are living longer. Yeah. So we are going to find that more people to have isolation at Christmas and it's really, really difficult because as I said to you earlier, suicide rates amongst the dark months, epidemic proportion. Yeah. Mental illness, sadness. But I think that the, the addition of social media in that as well, because it's, it's instant comparison and instant judgment. I don't do comparison. Just I always say for lots of people, they do and they will look on, they will look on social media and they will. You will see people who supposedly have. That are having the perfect Christmas or have had the perfect Christmas. Compare and despair. And there'll be all these images on Instagram and you immediately think that you have to live up to that. And it's piling pressure on people to live up to a certain standard of perfection that I think is ultimately with women is, look what I got for my boyfriend or husband. Exactly. And if. And it's ultimately not achievable. And. Well, they're not going to put their worst picture up there, are they? They're not going to put what really happened that, you know, they had a massive row and the dog had got out and they got run over or whatever and they're not speaking again until next year. But I think what you said is absolutely true. That it's not real. It's not real. That level of perfection isn't real. Well, perfection doesn't exist. No. We all strive. However, it's an unattainable goal, really. And Patsy. So, you know, is that it? I think so, yeah. I don't think. Is that all you've got going for you? More gin and hats? Well, there's nothing wrong with gin and hats. Come on. Well, again, you know, experience. I'm Just trying to, I'm trying to pitch my goals in terms of something that is achievable and fun. And I think so patrician. And I think that that is for me, it's, obviously I am going to be doing other things, but to give myself unachievable markers, I don't think is. If you ring me up and tell me that you've joined the local church coffee morning, I shall scream. Patsy, I know you and you're not boring. I don't think you need to worry about that, but. Well, hopefully not. I just think I'll have to call the white coats because it's not the Patsy I know. I think giving people unachie, achievable markers is, is just, you know, it's gonna be the downfall really of how people judge themselves. And I think generally people are too hard on themselves and it's, it's, it's not necessary. Well, Patsy, I hope the listeners are listening, especially girls. Why don't you just, all of you give yourselves a little break this year? Enjoy the fact that we are in 2019 and we can look forward to greater things ahead and to love more, share more and experience more. Experience more. Yeah, I think that is the message. If you have any comments, I say this week after week, please do send us an email. Our website is there for you to have a look at. You can look at the podcasts of the shows that we did last year and feel free to comment on any of those as well, or anything that you've heard this week. And the email address once again is presentersomensradiostation.com or tweet us at womensradiostn. Thank you so much for listening. Bye bye. 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This is where careers ignite, where playwrights take risks, where great actors perform just feet away from the audience. This is where magic happens. We would love you to join our mailing list or become a sponsor or just buy a ticket to one of our shows. The website is www.germanstreettheatre.co.uk. Women's Radio Station is a not for profit community interest company. Supporting women is our passion. We're currently welcoming donations to help towards our running costs to keep this important initiative alive. To donate simply head to our website. Every little will help on station.