Radical Well-being – A Teenager with a Voice

Hi, guys. Welcome to the Radical Wellbeing show on Women's Radio station. My name is Ingrid Marsh and we're here in our delightful studio in Covent Garden supporting women's wellbeing. So, as you know, on the Radical Wellbeing Show, I bring you ordinary women, ordinary women like me and you, who are sharing their unique stories. They are basically women who have refused to be defined by their pains, by stigma and or by stereotypes. Instead are taking back their power. As such, many of them have had to overcome huge obstacles in their lives to be where they are today. In any case, together. Our mission is a simple one, that's to inspire you to overcome life's challenges too, to don your wings, to kick away the roadblocks and be the person that you were born to be. As always, I'd love you to connect with us and engage with us at our studio. The email address is Presenters at womensradio Studio. And this week I'm interviewing who a person I'm calling a teenager with a voice. We always talk about women with voices, don't we? And of course I've got my own website, womenwithvoices.co.uk, but instead I'm talking about teenagers with voices because I think people are forgetting about the teenagers who have a voice and I actually think they're the future, but that's my opinion. They're the ones to me who are really kind of doing it right now, in my opinion. But I think we're not listening to them because we're thinking, oh, they're too young. Whereas there are many lessons to learn from the teenagers, I think. So the reason I'm talking about teenage. I know there's many parents at the moment worried about the exposure technology and how that affects toddlers, their development of toddlers rather. Sorry, but adolescence is an equally important period of rapid development and I just think too few of us are paying attention to how our teenagers use of technology is affecting them. In fact, experts worry that social media and text messages that have become so integral to teenagers lives are promoting anxiety and lowering self esteem. And we do have good reason to worry because a survey conducted by the Royal Society for public health asks 14 to 24 year olds in the UK how social media platforms are impacting their health and well being. And the survey results found that Snapchat, Facebook, Twitter and Instagram all led to increased feelings of depression, anxiety, poor body image and loneliness. So it's very difficult to find a voice despite with all this stuff going on with social media. But like I Said I've got someone in here who I feel is actually making a change, despite all that noise. Her name is Yasmin Stevens. She's 19 years of age and Jasmine grew up all over East London. She has had a privilege to travel around the world from a very young age. And she says it's these experiences that has influenced the way she lives her life today and how she constructs perceptions. She started writing just earlier this year and says that once she started, she just couldn't stop. So she expresses herself through spoken word poetry and has been published in an amazing book called Words by. A lot of her poetry stems from societal issues and also empowers women by focusing on altering their perceptions to influence change. So her aim is to motivate and encourage people in her age group to build up their confidence and seek something they enjoy and flourish in. Because, like a woman of my own heart, she believes that everyone has the talent and the capability to do so. So when I first met Yaz Jasmine, she was actually doing a poem on homelessness, which I was really impressed by. So I think it's only fair that we kick start with that. Over to you, Jasmin. What do we have? Enough food to waste, not enough to feed, enough money to spend, not enough to lend, enough land to build properties on, but not enough to provide roof overheads. Where have the priorities gone? These cold streets are leaving people to suffer when they sleep. A time where rest is key. But when can rest really start? When all is left is a cardboard sheet under the bodies of civilians? Where's the government to take action over these dreadful conditions? Of course, they're just considered as an interference to the human race. Just utter disgrace. Let's replace them with skyscrapers and office buildings. Forget the impoverished children just for a second. No. How can one neglect the concept of humanity? It's hard to have an understanding when there's a loss of magnanimity within our society, creating personalities that begin with anxiety, which proceeds into insanity, or those with the mentality of precious vanity. You see, the opposing lifestyles will always be in conflict. But how about if you evict yourself from the picture just for a while, and identify the unfortunate with the same human being profile as you? Wow. Hello, Jasmine. How are you, my lovely? I'm good, thank you. That is such a beautiful poem. Thanks. Okay, so before we talk more about the poem, what's in there, let's find out just a little bit about you. So you're 19, is that right? Just turned 19. Just turned 19. I know my son's 18 and he won't be able to do stuff like this. So where does all this come from? I mean, you had two choices in life. You could just be doing what everyone else is doing, but you're not. You are in stuff like this. Where did all this come from? Tell me about the early days. Early days. Well, I was very quiet when I was young, really very quiet. I wouldn't communicate. I just struggled with communication from very young. I was a very angry child as well. People wouldn't expect that today, but that's who I was. And, you know, I couldn't really express emotion, which was one thing as a child you try to do and you want to express. You know, you're figuring out what's sadness, what's happiness, these types of feelings. And when you're so young and you don't know how to control it or kind of, you know, express it, it's hard. So I just started writing, I guess, and I was so connected with music that, you know, I kind of connected with certain lyrics and everything. And I wasn't really into singing at the time, so I thought, oh, what's my kind of way of expressing but performing at the same time? And that's how I found out about spoken word. And I just started writing and writing and like you said, I just didn't stop, basically. And to this day I've just been writing still and, you know, now I'm involving myself in music as well by singing and kind of involving music with spoken words. So, yeah, anybody listening to that would be really surprised to know that you wasn't able to speak and that you were angry because. Because I know those on the outside listen to that, thinking she's really confident, she's all right. So you talked about you were angry. How did that manifest itself? So I think from very young, my parents split up and I guess from. What age were they? What age were you? Rather, all right, quite young. So I was very young. And, you know, being so being a child at that age, you're still developing your kind of schema, you know, emotional schema, anyway. And I guess because it was from so young, that kind of had a, you know, division in that, in my growth. But yeah, I just found a way eventually. And how did it show up? You said you were angry. How would people have seen you on the outside looking in? If my mum was here, she'd have a list of things. What would Mum say? And I've met Mum, haven't I? What would Mum say? She actually. So I used to write notes to her because I just physically couldn't talk to her. So I used to write instead my anger and write things, you know, like, I hate you when I was young. But I used to put it in, you know, again in writing. So she kept these notes and it was crazy actually, because I didn't even know I was like that until recently. So, yeah, I'd write about it or I just wouldn't say anything at all. But obviously as a parent, you kind of know you can, you know your child, don't you? So how did your mom respond to that? Do you remember? Oh, I am not too sure. I mean, I was so young, I can't remember. Yeah, yeah, I'm guessing she, you know, obviously trying to. I remember her trying to be like, you know, you can always talk to me and stuff, but I think a lot of. I had a lot of resentment and a lot of anger in me because of the split up. It was a bit like, I don't know how to show that, do you know what I mean? I hear you. There's so many people, young people, though, who feel like that. Yeah, I mean, you're not alone. Yeah, 100%. I mean, it's only like recently as I've grown up that, you know, I'm not alone. Because in primary school everyone's parents were together, right. So for me it was like, oh, I'm going to my mum's today or my dad's and everyone's like, oh, I'm going home. And how did you feel about that? I mean, I felt slightly outcasted, a bit different, I guess. Everyone had one support home, you know, one that they could always go back to. I was always constantly at mums or dad's, you know, packing bags, bringing clothes, left, right, center, you know, it was, it was a lot, especially in primary days, because you just want to be free at that age, don't you? You know. So, yeah. How do you feel about that? Now you look back at those days, I mean, sometimes I'm like, it's a bit emotional, but at the same time I kind of look back and think, if that didn't happen, I probably wouldn't be here today, you know what I'm doing, because I wouldn't have anything to write about or an experience to talk about or these feelings, you know? Yeah, that's really beautiful that you've realized that something actually awesome came from it. I mean, my son's in the same position in between two homes. I always say to him, like, does it bother you he's like, no, it's a break from each parent. Yeah, that's true as well, actually, because one parent, my mom used to be the more lenient one. So I'd be like, when I want to go out, go to mum's house. Yeah, she thoroughly enjoys it. But I hear what you mean at the time when there's all this, when the fairy tale shows that mummy, dad. And it's actually more perfect where not necessarily. Yeah, yeah, I appreciate that. So you're very angry. You talked about not being able to speak. So what are words like wanting to come out but would almost get stuck in your chest? Describe that a bit more. I mean, I think today, even today, sometimes I find it a bit of a struggle to talk. But I guess because you have an issue with saying certain things or speaking, it kind of builds up in your head and you're like, you know what? I'd rather just not say anything because I'm gonna sound. Was there anybody who is able to speak to around that time? Not. Not that I would go to Bar. Yeah, just kind of did it myself, really. But yeah. Cool. Okay, well, stick with us. We're gonna obviously take on. Just go through. To go through your whole journey, how it was and how it is now and how you got to write in this beautiful work. We're gonna hear lots more of your poetry throughout this. But truly beautiful that you did find a way to express yourself and to let those inner feelings out. You listen to Ingrid Marsh on the Radical well Being show. I'm here with Jasmine, Stephen. Jasmine's a 19 year old teenager. I'm calling her the teenager with a voice because I really believe that half my audience of this age group, to be honest, it's half my age because I feel that they're radical. They're now speaking up and speaking out and bringing about a change. And I have a lot of time for them. And this is what I want people to start doing is stop thinking. Like, someone wrote something on Facebook the other day and I really wanted to die and say no. Just like, oh, when you're younger, you feel like this. When you're older, you're more wise. And I'm like, we have those biases in our head that when you're older, you're wise. No, you get old fools. Do you know what I mean? You get old wise people, you get old fools. You get young wise people, you get young faults. And these biases are keeping us away from learning and growing and I'd love to bring an end to that. And I've got Jasmine here with us today. We're going to speak to Jasmine some more. We're going to be sharing some more of her beautiful poetry. So stay with us. I know many parents out there who are listening to this have children in exactly the same situation, tied up with social media, crushing their spirits, crushing their souls, and they want to bring about a change. I'm going to show you, we're going to show you how you can do that, how we can start living our lives to the fullest and living the life that we were supposed to live. Don't forget to stay with us. There's lots more coming. Welcome to Women's Radio Station. I'm Sarah Louise Ryan and welcome to Love Lessons live on Women's Radio Station. Hello and welcome to future Classic Women Awards with me, Stefania Passamonte on Women's Radio Station. Hello and welcome to Julie Mae is listening. Hi, this is Anna Kennedy and we're at Women's Radio Station supporting women's well being and we're talking all things autism women. The possibilities are endless. That's what makes us different. Hi, I'm Lauren Mishkon. I'm a birth doula and mum of three and I'm passionate about supporting women to have empowering and positive birth experiences. Please join me for my brand new show, From Tummy to Mummy here on Women's Radio Station. Every week I'll be here with an expert guest talking about women's reproductive health, everything fertility, pregnancy, birth and baby related right through to the menopause and beyond. Please join us for an informative and fun hour. My name is Ingrid Marsh and I host the Radical Wellbeing show supporting women's well being. On my show I bring you ordinary women like me and you who are sharing their unique stories. Women who have refused to be defined by their pains to be silenced by stigma or crushed by stereotypes, and who are taking back their power. And together, our mission is a simple one and that's to inspire you to kick away the roadblocks too. To don your wings and be the person that you were born to be. Hi, I'm Hazel Butterfield, a blogger, book lover and mental health advocate. And you can listen to my show get booked here at Women's Radio station daily at 5am and 5pm throughout my shows we'll talk about the books I've read, new releases, chat to authors, publishers and book enthusiasts, all with a theme and and aim of supporting women's emotional well being. If you have a book to tell us about, get in touch@presentersomensradiostation.com join me on my show and share my love of books and writing. Do you want to be a doula? Would you like to support families through pregnancy, birth and the postnatal period? Do you have qualities of compassion, listening, caring and empowering? At Nurturing Birth, we offer approved doula training courses across the UK which are facilitated by an award winning doula. Here you will learn more about the support you can offer, explore the doula role and think about how to set up your business. No need for previous qualifications. Find out more@nurturingbirth.co.uk. You're listening to women's radio stations supporting women's well being, women's radio sessions, creating a global network for the empowerment of women and we want you to be involved. Join us on Instagram and Twitter womensradio station, that's womensradiostn or Facebook Women's radio station to keep up to date with all our exciting programmes. Welcome back, guys. Listen to Ingrid Marsh on Women's Radio Station from our studio here in Covent Garden. Supporting women's wellbeing. I'm talking to the teenager with a voice. I'm corner spoken word artist Jasmine Stephen and her mission. She's on a mission to influence change, she says, and she wants to do that through her poetry, which is designed to help women alter their perceptions on the many issues currently disempowering them. She's on a mission to motivate and encourage people of her own age group to build up their confidence and seek something they enjoy and flourish in, because she truly believes that I do, that everyone has a talent and the capability to do so. Yasmeen, you just. Jasmine rather, you just read out a really beautiful poem about homelessness. Now we're fast, we're moving fast, everyone's really busy. We're walking straight ahead and it's a habit. We can't help moving at a speed like this. But you're not, you're stopping and you're looking down. Yeah. How did that come about? And why? Oh, gosh, I mean, you, everywhere you go, there's someone on the street. I mean, I hate to admit it, but it's so true. It's becoming such a big, you know, popular thing to see and unfortunately it's quite sad to see, especially with the weather outside now, you know, you walk down with big jackets and we're still saying, oh, it's cold. So imagine those, you know, just sitting there without anything. But, yeah, no, I just realized that it's becoming Quite a popular thing. And attitudes towards it sometimes aren't very, you know, nice to hear. So what are some of the things that you hear people say that just infuriates you? Just, you know, I guess the attitude. You see people saying, oh, well, you had a choice in life, or I mean, it's hard to say because you don't know the circumstance of that person. But who knows? Because that person might have actually been, you know, trying and you just don't know. Behind closed doors, you know, someone's book. So, yeah, I just, you know, things like that just really. I just really thought to myself and one day I was just like, you know what? Let me write about something like that because it really breaks my heart. You know, my mom and I, we luckily. But my mum almost fell into that hole of becoming, you know, homeless, I guess you could say. Yeah. But luckily, you know, she had help and everything. So. Yeah, you just. It could happen to anyone, really. I couldn't agree with you more. And even from my own life, I've been rich and I've been poor, you just know it's such a thin line and anything could happen. We just cannot, cannot judge. And I, like you have heard people say some really nasty things. I just think. Just don't say it. Please don't say that because you just don't know. Okay, let's go to one of your other poems, Jasmine. This is another beautiful one. This one's called Empty. No, no, not do. Empty. We can do. We can do that one a minute. That's one of my other favorite ones. Want too much out of you? Fool's Paradise. Beautiful. Take the fall out of beauty. That's what he made me. Filled with the wrong intentions. I craved him more and more every day. Beautiful. Take the fall out of beauty. That's what he made me. Her beautiful little fool. I get it. It's too much to give her full respect. Show her the dirtiest of disrespect. I should have known the side effects of love. Or shall I say lust. All along I thought I was cuffed. Perhaps not. I guess not. He created something that didn't match my reflection. A different version from my concept of perfection. He was given my fullest attention. That just resulted to self deception. His impertinence transformed into a revised perception of mine. Entrainment is what restricted my third eye from opening up. He had prescribed me with the highest dose of the strongest medication. The deceived lethal injections. It started to alter my vision. Blurring out the lines to the point Where I became blind Visual restriction is what led to my bloodshot eyes Trigger pulled, bam. Shot once, shot twice I was living in a fool's paradise Was I the life of a ho, sket, slag or whore? Oblivious to it all he abused his power to abuse my weakness he was truly an alchemist Days on end he'd play with chemicals Inducing me with toxic potions Crying my only cathartic release Product of his mind's compulsion Addiction never led to lonesome peace Trigger pulled, bamboo Shot once, shot twice I was just living in a fool's paradise thank you. Another awesome, awesome poem. Straight from the heart. And once again, so many women can resonate with this. I'm thinking, why are you having this already at 90? I think, yeah, I was having all this at 19. And it's funny because I don't usually talk about relationships and I do shows for reasons being that it's just too new messages out there that says we're only validated through having a man or a woman, depending on your sexual preference or have you, or through having a partner. But the reason I want to touch on this one because I'm doing a lot of work myself with this whole narcissism thing and narcissist partners and how they can just really take your soul and strip you apart. Is this something that happened to you personally or is about somebody else low key? I mean, I don't think it's with intent from the other partner. I have a lot of love for him. We have a really, you know, deep relationship. But I guess with anyone you can love someone, but it can be unhealthy at times, you know, and it's hard to kind of balance your heart and your head a lot because even though some people are conscious to the negative energy or whether you're unconscious, it's. It's still there, you know. And yeah, so this, this one that I wrote actually is kind of some experience but also I guess, you see, I've witnessed a lot of relationships actually that, you know, where my friends are in, I guess, mentally abusing relationships and it's not nice to see. And you. It's so hard to kind of be like, what are you doing with him? Da, da, da. But when you're in that relationship, it's. It's another experience to, you know, be in, I guess. And why do you feel you or friends, what have you. Why do you feel that you stay despite this? I think people, like I said, you know, there's a kind of revised perception. You're, you Know, every day you're with that person or in communication with that person, you're kind of naturally entraining your mind to talk to them. So, you know, through time, when you distance yourself, you crave that energy again and again and it kind of becomes a habitual mindset that you have. And, you know, it's not necessarily a bad thing, but if it becomes uncontrollable, then that's where you have to kind of draw the line a bit. And if it's making you unwell. Yeah, exactly. You know, be healthy. Exactly. And I think that's where sometimes people. I think, I guess people in relationships kind of miss. They, you know, they don't realize what's going on because. Yeah. Been a revised perception, I guess. Are you out of that relationship now? From that feeling, from that pull? Yeah, I'm out of that feeling. I mean, I'm still in contact with him. We're such good friends. Like, he's one of my best friends, I would say. He actually pushed me to start writing and made me write, so I'm grateful for him. But sometimes, you know, relationships can get a bit complicated. And with us two, it did, but. But at the same time, we're both mature enough and we have a similar mindset to be okay with being friends and just carrying on a relationship that we still prosper and love. And how did you replace that energy that you were getting from him? That whatever you were getting from him, what was filling your soul, quote, unquote, to a degree. What did you replace that with? I guess listening to music, writing. It really made me write a lot, to be fair. Yeah, A lot of my poems kind of stemmed from that, but also, I guess, communicating as well. I pushed myself to communicate because if I didn't talk to him about how I felt, it would just stay the same and. Yeah, so you're able to be vulnerable. Vulnerable with him like that. That's quite lovely. Yeah. You in a relationship now? No, I'm single. But, yeah, I literally, I'm okay with my own. My own self. Me, myself and I. Yeah. That's wonderful because it starts with that, doesn't it? This is my concern, I think that people keep being told that or through the messages and the imagery is that you're not complete unless you have someone. I know, I know. It's funny, someone said to me the other day, they said, like, they couldn't believe that's how I feel. And I was like, ingrid, you could make loads of money like that, running courses. You can actually be alright. By yourself. It's like, yeah, yeah. I mean, I always say to, to girls my age as well, I never fear solitude because you have to be with yourself in order to, you know, progress in life. You have to, you find stuff about yourself. Every day you learn new things. Like, you know, who knew I could talk on a radio station, you know, for the first time? And today I've learned that I can. So every day is a learning day. Yeah. And it's weird like you say that, you say like, don't fear solitude. I couldn't quit. Like I crave solitude if I don't have it. But my son would go to his dad's, I'd be like, yeah, you're out the house. And I love him dearly and he's a great kid. But yeah, I crave it because like you said, you need that time to refuel your, refuel your soul and to feed yourself again and to rest and nurture your inner child. So. But yeah, that's the big thing, isn't it? People fear in solitude. That's a really big one that needs overcome where there's actually something quite lush from it. So yeah, I'm glad you, yeah, I'm glad you found that. Okay. But yeah, stick with us. We're going to be talking to you some more. Like I said, guys, I'm joined by the lovely Jasmine Stevens. She's a 19 year old teenager with a voice you can see already that, you know, she's skipped to the tune of her own drum. You know, she's been able to detach from the messages of the outside world that says, this is what you need to make you happy. This is what you need to make you perfect. If you have all these things, you'll be happy. You know that fairy that they just keep ramming down our throats. And despite what everyone keeps saying about social media, kids and social media and all the rest of it and it is influenced in their lives, but there are women we can see young women who are actually taking the bull by the horns and actually saying, well, I'm disconnecting from those messages and I'm actually defining me and defining who I am and find my own happiness. And we know that this is a situation that we are in as women. We need to be finding our voices. But I do believe last week I was like, oh, is there a change? Is there really a change? And then I meet people like Jasmine. I'm going like, yes, yes, there is. There is hope. We can do this. So don't forget, guys, love you to engage with us presenters@womensradiostation.com we're going to be listening to more, more, more more of Jasmine's beautiful poetry and she's going to help us give you some advice too as a parent as to how can we deal with this with our teenagers? How can we encourage them to find that wonderfulness, that awesomeness that's already inside them, that they don't need to be seeking outside of themselves, that's already inside of them? We'll be talking to Jasmine a lot more about that so we know, you know, that we are already enough, my darlings. We are enough. Make sure you stay with us. Welcome to the Women's Radio Station Supporting Women's well Being Women's Radio Station is all about diversity from opinions, career, ethnicity, education and most importantly, women's well being. We aim to celebrate the individuality of every woman everywhere, providing opportunities and the platform for your voice. Visit our website womensradiostation.com for more information. I'm Tamina Zaman, founder of Empower and Enrich. When it comes to money, do you clam up or get confused? Do you wish you could save more money or are you hoping you have enough for retirement? You are not alone. Many women want to be smarter with their cash but just don't know where to start. @empowerandenrich.org you will find a host of options to help you take charge of your finances and learn how to put your money to work for you in an easy, affordable way. Get in touch with me@empowerandenrich.org and let's change your future together. Do you want to be a doula? Would you like to support families through pregnancy, birth and the postnatal period? Or do you have qualities of compassion, listening, caring and empowering? At Nurturing Birth we offer approved doula training courses across the UK which are facilitated by an award winning doula. Here you will learn more about the support you can offer, explore the doula role and think about how to set up your business. No need for previous qualifications. Find out more@nurturingbirth.co.uk hi, I'm Carolyn Van Beers. Please join me for a brand new show here on women's radio station Its Mother's Hour. If, like me, you're a mum juggling far too many balls and dropping most of them, this is definitely the show for you. We'll examine the highs and lows of motherhood and make sure you laugh out loud as we take on this challenging role together with spoonfuls of Advice, incredible stories. It will be refreshing, honest and funny. Look at being a mum. Are you struggling with money? Turn to us as a national charity helping people struggling to make ends meet. Job loss, illness or bereavement can cause a real financial crisis. We give practical help to get people back on track. Whether you're thinking of having a baby, trying to get out of an unhappy relationship, or just unsure what benefits you may be entitled to, we can help. Visit turntous.org.uk welcome to the Women's Radio Station supporting women's well being. Women's Radio station can give voice to your brand. With a wide range of sponsorship opportunities, including individual programs, we can tailor your experience for you. For more information on how you can sponsor a Show, go to womensradiostation.com Women's radio station supporting women's well being. Welcome back, guys. Listen to Ingrid Marsh on Women's Radio Station Supporting women's well being. I'm talking to Teenager with a Voice. I'm calling it the Teenager with a Voice. And spoken word artist Jasmine Stephen. And she's helping me to help you with our teenagers at the moment. Yes, there are a lot of them addicted to the whole social media thing. We want to talk about that, want to get them away from that, to find their own voice and also, you know, how they can use spoken word poetry to express themselves. They're all going through this turmoil at the moment, but still, despite I'm saying all that, I still feel they're the answers for tomorrow. If I look at my own age group, you know, it was harder for us. Do you know what I mean? We really applied, you know, we stuck to the rules. Like if they said this makes you perfect, we stuck to it. And we suffered our souls and squashed our souls, squashed our awesomeness, destroyed our awesomeness to stick to these rules. And now when I meet the millennials and you know, Generation Z and all the rest of it, this is a completely different breed. Despite the fact they crushed one area, I still feel they're the ones who are speaking up, speaking out and not abiding by the rules, especially the rules. What they say makes you a woman. And let's face it, you know, women's rights has come a long way in this country since 19th century. And more than eight decades have passed since women gained the right to vote in this country. But we still. But still, rather, although we make up half the population in the workforce in this country, we are still underrepresented and underpaid at top levels of employment. One in four women in the world will be subjected to domestic abuse and two women will be killed every week in the UK alone by a current or former partner. So we still have a long way to go. And the answer, I believe, comes with people like Jasmine. Jasmine, thank you so very much for being with us. I think we ought to go into another one of your poems. Let's go with empty, hungry out in this world. It starves the minds from reaching the possible potential. It's easy to digest information that's not even factual through consuming data that is handed to us on accessible screens. I mean, we're all victims. Society feeds us with the wrong information. That's why we're still hungry. Absorbing and ingesting irrelevant information like what Kim K's outfit of the day is builds upon the mind's metabolism, speeding up the rate of reaction. It becomes a part of the daily routine. Mixing the sprite with the medicated syrup to produce Lean. It makes us thirsty. Thirsty out in this world. It quenches the minds from reaching the possible potential. It's easy to become drenched in thoughts. We start to drown in drowning in the lifestyles we wish to have. One thing. There's little reality shown in a reality show. But try tell that to a young boy who's flooded with materialistic mindsets. It becomes his mindset, an habitual mindset. He's so blinded by his privileges he's forgotten that his parents had to fend on their knees for him to stand on his own two feet. He's labeled in brands, he thinks he's supreme living his Gucci lifestyle. Meanwhile his eyes have been captured. He's fallen in love with that girl Chanel wore. Was it Zara? The one that wears the juicy couture and always smelling of Christian Dior? Yeah. He's the man, the real champion. I guess you could define him as in this world of ours because these modern day perceptions are contributing to confusion. No conclusion on any resolution on the illusions globalization has created for us human. Adapting to the western ideas, it becomes a social norm creating nonmeathetic approaches to the entirety of the world. But we're forgetting the processes behind all the material we're getting exploiting and finessing off brothers and sisters. Their land is worth more than anything. Their value is worth more than anything. Paid less than pound one every hour, cheap labor. Just look at how much power this western world has. Just look how sour this Western world is. But most importantly, just look at us in this western world we're living in. Thank you. Oh, I love It. I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it. Listen, there's some more powerful stuff going on in there, hun, like you're amazing. Thank you. But listen, let me ask you a question because I don't know this answer and it's something I battle within my brain often. Is it that other people can see what you see but it's just too hard and it's much more easier to carry on doing what we're doing or do you just go by your friends? Obviously we've done no research into this, proper research. Or do you feel that they just can't see it and are just sort of skipping along to the tune? What would you say? I think it's both really. I mean everyone grows up in a different environment. I mean I've always been taught, you know, you have to, you have to, you know, be, be privileged. Like, I mean not be privileged but as in how do I say, be grateful? Exactly, yeah, that's the word I'm looking for. Be grateful of the privileged life I have lived. And I guess, you know, things such as social media, they don't really help with, I guess nowadays generation to acknowledge the, the grateful being grateful. So I guess, yeah, I mean it really depends on them. Yeah, I hear you. So it's that gratitude just being grateful, what we have. So you said that we're, you know, the generation now spoiled. Is that what it is? In some ways. I mean, I think, I think people are just very blinded. You know, it's so you literally open up Instagram or whatever app you have and it will be about someone else's life. Everyone's so invested in everyone else's life that you forget real life. You know, you're constantly focused on the media life and who's doing what. What she wearing, where does she get it from? Oh, her hair is nice. You know, it's all about image as well and that has a massive impact. You, you're so focused on, I guess, very small minded. I guess you could say things that you forget the bigger picture outside that you're living in real life, not a virtual reality, you know, so it's. Yeah, I'm sure you're only 19. Yeah. So awesome. I'll have these conversations with people my age. It's my issue when people start saying that all the young don't know anything and the older one, it just drives me insane. That's one thing I always battle with because I mean, I don't really like to talk about my age a lot And I have a poem about age that was my first ever written one. I was 18 at the time. But everyone I come across, I was like, oh, you. Are you, like 20 something? I'm like, no, I'm actually 19. Wow, you're very mature for your age. But what is mature for my age? You just cannot define age. It's such a concept. I feel like jumping over this microphone and just hugging you. I have these big old arguments with people as well. I was having a conversation with a friend the other day, and I was like, oh, you know. You know, you're 52, you're getting on. I know, you spring chicken. I was like, you just keep them words to yourself. Because it was just that. I just think it's all mindset. If I start listening to images like that, I'll start bending over, look at when I see what them images are like. 50 odd people are just thinking, they can't be targeting me. And that's funny, actually. It was an old boyfriend, many, many years ago. It's the wisest thing anyone ever said to him. And he said, you never know who your next message is coming from. And it was like, they could be 19, they could be nine, they could be 90. Do you know what I mean? You just don't know. So these biases, everyone knows I'm a biased nutcase. You know, it's one thing, I think, if we just eliminate that from our lives, but the imagery, Han, you know, I've spoken to teenagers and, you know, they hear it all the time, but it's not real. It's not real. And I've spoken to teenagers. They said, we know it's not real, but you can't help it. Why do you think that is? I think because it's been so embedded from so young that it's kind of, you know, it's not real, but you're so involved in it and have. Have been for so long that it does become kind of real in some aspects. You know, everything is literally run by your phone. You don't even need newspapers anymore to know what's going on. You have your tv, you have your phone. Your phone is literally with you all the time. So it's, you know, it's become a habit, basically, and habits are so hard to break. And I was thinking the other day, like, oh, you know, I don't want to be on my phone, but I need to be on my phone in order to, you know, send an email or see what. I don't know what I'm doing tomorrow. Because my plans are on my diary, on my phone. So it's just no escape, basically. Yeah, yeah. And there's a wonderful book and I can't remember his surname. It's called Hooked by Amir. And I will find it, guys, and I'll put it on my website as well. And it really talks about how you get hooked into it and how the likes could. We want to be liked, we want to fit in. So those likes that we're getting, those acknowledgements, is just bringing us deeper and deeper in. But, yeah, like I said, although it's not real. Do you feel, though, that we're not concert or not, we're not concentrating on our own lives? Is it that we just feel so dissatisfied with our own lives that it's just much more. It's almost a form of escapism which people are looking for. And it's like, if I don't do that, I've got to concentrate on my life and I just don't want to do that. This is much more fun. Although they then feel ill afterwards. I think there is that aspect of things where, you know, you're. You have that kind of routine of Instagram and Snapchat, and again, like I said, you're constantly seeing other people's lives and then, you know, you see what's happening and you want to fit in and so the desire to be liked is there, and then you start to, you know, kind of try to fit in with people and change yourself. But, yeah, but also, I guess there's that time in the day where you become bored and what is there to do, you know? I mean, everything, again, is on your phone. Games, even gaming, is a massive thing now as well, for young kids, like my brother, he's young and he's into gaming, and I'm just like, are you allowed to play games like that at your age? I don't know, but it's just. He's able to do that, so it's quite scary. I'm gonna ask you a question, and I was asking myself this question yesterday, and my answer, Flipp between the two. So we're interested to know what. What your answer is. And being totally honest, social media, friend or foe? Oh, see, I can't pick. It's both. I know I struggle. It depends how you use it. It depends on how you use it, isn't it? Because initially I was like, foe. I hate it. It's destroyed people's lives. I remember life before it and I was so much, you know, we were all so much happier. Yeah, but on the other hand, it's where depending on how you use it can also empower you. It's how we can have a voice and get our voices out there and bring about change. So I actually ultimately went for friend. Isn't that mental despite all this? Can't believe I'm saying that. The time is going, guys. The time again. You're with Ingrid Marsh and the wonderful Jasmine Stephen, where the teenager with a voice. Aren't you just loving her? I love her. I love her. Please come and motivate my son. Sick of me and my son. We're both at it together. It'd be marvelous so we can raise a future king. So don't forget, guys, love you. To connect with us Here, presenters@womensradiostation.com this is of course the radical wellbeing show and we're bringing about a change for us women, for us girlies and for guys too who are listening in. We know we empower you, so stick with us. One more session to go. Welcome to Women's Radio Station. I'm Sarah Louise Ryan and welcome to Love Lessons live on Women's Radio Station. Hello and welcome to future Classic Women Awards with me, Stefania Passamonte on Women's Radio Station. Hello and welcome to Julie Mae is listening. Hi, this is Anna Kennedy and we're at Women's Radio Station supporting women's well being and we're talking all things autism women. The possibilities are endless. That's what makes us different. Hi, I'm Lauren Mishkon. I'm a birth doula and mum of three and I'm passionate about supporting women to have empowering and positive birthing experiences. Please join me for my brand new show From Tummy to Mummy here on Women's Radio Station. Every week I'll be here with an expert guest talking about women's reproductive health, everything, fertility, pregnancy, birth and baby related, right through to the menopause and beyond. Please join us for an informative and fun hour. My name is Ingrid Marsh and I host the Radical Wellbeing show supporting women's wellbeing. On my show, I bring you ordinary women like me and you, who are sharing their unique stories. Women who have refused to be defined by their pains, to be silenced by stigma or crushed by stereotypes, and who are taking back their power. And together, our mission is a simple one. And that's to inspire you to kick away the roadblocks too. To don your wings and be the person that you were born to be. Hi, I'm Hazel Butterfield, a blogger book lover and mental health advocate and you can listen to my show. Get booked here at Women's Radio Station daily at 5am and 5pm throughout my shows we'll talk about the books I've read, new releases, chapter authors, publishers and book enthusiasts all with a theme and aim of supporting women's emotional well being. If you have a book to tell us about, get in touch@presenterswomensradiostation.com join me on my show and share my love of books and writing. Do you want to be a doula? Would you like to support families through pregnancy, birth and the post period? Do you have qualities of compassion, listening, caring and empowering? At Nurturing Birth we offer approved Doula training courses across the UK which are facilitated by an award winning doula. Here you will learn more about the support you can offer, explore the doula role and think about how to set up your business. No need for previous qualifications. Find out more at nurturingbirth.co.uk. You're listening to women's radio stations supporting women's well being. Women's Radio station's creating a global network for the empowerment of women and we want you to be involved. Join us on Instagram and Twitter Immins Radio station, that's Women's Radio STN or Facebook Women's Radio station to keep up to date with all our exciting programmes. Welcome back. Listen to Ingrid Marsh at Women's Radio Station from our studio at Covent Garden supporting women's well being. I'm talking to the teenager with a voice and spoken word artist, the lovely Jasmine. Stephen, I'm going to wattle on too much now because I want her to go into her final poem for this evening called Real Relay Phone Chips. Over to you Jasmine. My relationship with my phone is deeper than the ones I call loved ones. You see, I take it everywhere with me, helps me with directions when I get lost or tells me how much things cost. It even talks to me when I have a question like hey Siri, how do I get rid of this indigestion? Who needs people when you have everything on a screen? I mean we're no longer going to see any more green by the amount of iPhone screens that surround me, I'm living in a digital forest for the rest of my living years. I really do fit because not only are people becoming closer online, but more distant face to face. But who cares because we got FaceTime. I love how we can talk when I'm not with you via text, but then you get vexed. Oops, sorry cause you Read my messages wrong. All because I forgot to put one emoticon to set my tone right. This non verbal communication life is a tough one, I'm not gonna lie. So I tried to call you, but you just declined. Ugh, here we go again. Maybe next time I'll add a kiss to show you that I actually miss you and I'm not just blabbering nonsense and so you don't take my sentence out of context. Phone. I've been nothing but loyal to you and you do me dirty like this. You've now made my mood switch and trust me, it's not a pretty sight. I'm certain my private online detective won't want to describe it either. But it's alright, I'll just tap into Google and see what resolutions come up with. How to deal with a real diva. I'm diving deeper than I ever thought. I'm running out of oxygen. Risking my life in order to survive. Get me out of this tunnel vision life. If I had ever known how toxic this relay phone shit may have been, I would have never thought twice of jumping in. But here I, you, us, we are all struggling. You see this relationship, it's a love hate relay phone ship. Thank you. Well done, Jasmine. This is a girl who is like. I couldn't speak, I was shy, I was quite. Look at the transformation we could make, guys, you know, once again, such an important poem, Jasmine. I'm loving it. You know, my concern with this whole phones thing at the moment, if you think about the relationship and the bond we've got here right now, the studio, do you know what I mean? Like, you know, the telephone, it's two dimensional. Yeah. You know what you see, what you hear. But there's that spiritual aspect that we're missing out on. That touch, that feel, that empathy, that insight, that aura you cannot get through a telephone. Relationships are being crushed. Proper, true, authentic relationships are being crushed. What made you write that? What were you going through at the time? So my relationship with the guy, my previous guy, it was actually a lot of it was online because he lives in Glasgow, he now and then comes back, he goes to school in Glasgow. But yeah, so I mean, I, you know, we had a breakdown in our relationship. Relationship. And I was just thinking, you know, the phone is just. We rely on it to talk to other people, but it doesn't create longevity, you know, it's actual being in touch with people for face to face. And it's the idea, you know, where I said we've got FaceTime, so who cares? But at the same time you don't have that one to one interaction with that person. So you're, you're missing that, you know what I mean? You crave that. So yeah, it's just so worrying, isn't it? This is the part that this is where I could go like social media, telephone. Because those relationships that love, that authentic love is not being built. And my fear is that this, this is where it's all going wrong, where the stress and anxiety is coming in because we're meant to have that soul to soul connection. Yeah. Jasmine, you know I could have you here for another hour because these are big old topics. We're just skimming the surface. Can you give me, Jasmine, three radical well being tips that. Oh no, before we do that I've got to. I know there'll be parents answering the question. Any advice to parents with teenagers going through this thing who may be feeling a bit stuck? If you, as a, if you as your adult self talking to you, what would you say? I think, I think all parents try to be like get off your phone. But you need to find an excuse to be off your phone. I don't know, venture somewhere, try to be more family involved. Whether that be doing trips abroad or doing trips even locally. Going to the shop is a, is a massive change. I don't know. Talking about on the way to the shop is a massive change. You know, just five minutes of your day, how was school? You know, things like that. Some people, some teenagers don't want to talk, which is hard. But it's, it's just about trying to communicate. Yeah. And recognizing that that is a habit too we're trying to break. It's like an addiction, it's another addiction, a gambling addiction. It has to be broken slowly, bit by bit, bit by bit. I've got to do a whole program on habits. An interesting topic, my lovely. So now I'll ask you for your three radical well being tips. Yeah. So one of them I'd say is to self cultivate yourself. What do you mean by that? So self cultivation is basically teaching yourself things. So instead of relying on someone else to tell you, I don't know, for example, a fact or something, seek it yourself, you know, learn it yourself. Self cultivation. Yeah, I love that and I love that very much because I do feel sometimes we're just not reading enough. Yeah. Reading is a massive game changer. Massive, massive game changer. And people are out there talking a whole lot of stuff. I just think, when's the last time you read a book or reading is. Yeah, that's right. Seek the answer yourself. That's a form of intelligence too. So, yep. The other two, I'd say set a goal, because setting a goal will just push you to get. Get somewhere. Otherwise you're just going to be in that maintenance kind of cycle, which can get frustrating at times. I'm going to add a little bit to that. Sorry. I say set intentional goals, like ones where it's like mind, body and spirit. I mean, like holistic goal, putting your mind, body and spirit into that goal and it makes it much more achievable. And next one. And to be true to yourself, you know, don't let anyone try to police you in your life. You know, if anything, you write your own book. I've always said this. Everyone has an individual book. You write that yourself, create it, draw pictures in it if you want to, you know, write silly things. Everyone has. Has their own authenticity in their book. So, yeah, God bless you, Jasmine. And I definitely need you back on the session as well to maybe we can do an event together or something like that to help people write some poetry. Spoke about poetry, help them perform it and stuff like that. My lovelies. So I'm just gonna wrap up with my. Ingrid says a massive, massive, massive thank you to the wonderful Jasmine. You see that she's a powerhouse. This is all about helping teenagers, teenagers in particularly, to find their voices. But let's keep it real. And part of my Ingrid says, I'd like to give you a quote by Melinda Gates. And she says it's a quote that she said at the Powerful Voices annual luncheon in 2003. And she said, a woman with a voice is by definition a strong woman. But the search to find that voice can be remarkably difficult. And, you know, I'm going to keep it real. I'm all about keeping it real because I still feel that for women, where we've been told that we're supposed to be silent, where we're supposed to be pink and passive and pink and pretty, the moment we have a voice, I still feel we're being burnt at the stake. You know, metaphorically, they're still burning us at the stake like they did, you know, back in medieval days, for having a voice, for daring to speak up and speak out. So, yes, it does take courage and it takes strength. It takes a strong woman to do that. I still today get gangs. I get groups who collaborate together to try and silence me by being me, to me. And yes, I cry and it hurts, but I will always rise again because I will not be silenced. You have to remember. And the reason I wrote, the reason I won't be silenced, because I want us to remember that our unique perspective, Jasmine, unique perspective, that teenager's unique perspective, everybody's unique perspective, it could change the world. It could bring an end to inequality, it could bring an end to homelessness, it can bring an end to climate change. Your solution, your voice could have possibly sorted out Brexit, who knows? And that is irrespective of your age, irrespective of your race, irrespective of your gender. So your voice matters. The thing is, my dance is to do it a little bit. Little bit, little bit. You just step out the comfort because it feels scary. Because we want to fit in. There's always that thing that's going to want to draw us back in again. You want to speak up, you want to speak out, you want to have an opinion. But there's that big old need in our head to fit in. So let's, you know, I do understand and it is a process. One of the reasons I was, you know, in love with Jasmine, one of the poems I was in love with, all of them I was in love with. But I particularly love that one about Empty where she talks about the materialistic mindset due to socialization. You know, these are things again, they're just being programmed into our mind, so it's very difficult to detach from them. But once you become, you know, just be true to yourself, once you become knowledgeable, you open up your third eye, so to speak, it really does empower you to say, well, actually, you know, I don't have to do this. I don't have to buy this. I can buy it because I want to, because it's a form of self. Self expression as opposed to buying it to fit in. I gain, regain hope and strength by meeting people like Jasmine. I hope you do too, because it makes me realize that a change is going to come. Let's start listening to the youth, please, let's start listening to the youth because they have voices. I did a program with, I loathe them the other day, the NCS Challenge, and they were like. And like I said, forget your stereotype. There were like young black boys there, for example, who want to do something about graffiti, who wanted to do something about climate change. You know what I mean? They have voices. I just don't feel they're being heard. And I think we are missing out as a result. Remember, when it comes to writing, to trust yourself, to write the way you Think and talk. Your unique perspective and your unique voice matters. If you're worried about fitting in, then find your audience. Everyone's gonna like you. When I used to be talking this stuff, people of my own age group, not all of them don't want to generalise, would hate me. Like, why don't you shut up? Do you know what I mean? And then I'd go into talking, it'd be a whole load of millennials and I would think I was absolutely fantastic. Alright, my darlings. So it's a matter of not being quiet, not shutting up, not silencing yourself. But it is a matter of finding your audience. There are people who feel like you do. You find your audience and you write and you speak for them. There's a whole community of people feel like you. But we've got to cut out those biases because we have to remember they may not look like we do. Guys, you know, I could go on and on and on. Solitude, we touched on that. That's important to know that, to nurture your inner child because when we have our ego, that's the stops us from talking out is because our ego is trying to protect our inner child. Okay, so if we nurture our inner child, we can then start letting go of that ego. Another big topic for another day. I have to cover it on another show and I do want to end up by saying that this is not a man against woman thing. We need to come together as one for the betterment of all of us. All right. I get really annoying. I hear people saying that. My lovelies. That was a quick wrap up for Very quick English says I'm back here same time next week. I hope you enjoy the show as much as I did. Jasmine, thank you so much again. Thank you. Another awesome show. Make sure you join me again next week on the radical well being show. We're going to get your voices heard. We're going to get you to don your wings and fly. And let's also remember that you are enough. Thank you. Welcome to the women's radio station supporting women's well being. Women's radio station is all about diversity from opinion, career, ethnicity, education and most importantly, women's well being. We aim to celebrate the individuality of every woman everywhere, providing opportunities and the platform for your voice. Visit our website womensradiostation.com for more information. I'm Tamina Zaman, founder of Empower and Enrich. When it comes to money, do you clam up or get confused? Do you wish you could save more money or Are you hoping you have enough for retirement? You are not alone. Many women want to be smarter with their cash but just don't know where to start. @empowerandenrich.org you will find a host of options to help you take charge of your finances and learn how to put your money to work for you in an easy, affordable way. Get in touch with me@empowerandenrich.org and let's change your future together. Do you want to be a doula? Would you like to support families through pregnancy, birth and the postnatal period? Do you have qualities of compassion, listening, caring and empowering? At Nurturing Birth we offer approved doula training courses across the UK which are facilitated by an award winning doula. Here you will learn more about the support you can offer, explore the doula role and think about how to set up your business. No need for previous qualifications. Find out more@nurturingbirth.co.uk hi, I'm Carolyn Van Beers. Please join me for a brand new show here on women's radio station. It's Mother's Hour. If, like me, you're a mum juggling far too many balls and dropping most of them, this is definitely the show for you. We'll examine the highs and lows of motherhood and make sure you laugh out loud as we take on this challenging role together with spoonfuls of advice, incredible stories. It will be refreshing, honest and funny. Look at being a mum. Are you struggling with money? Turn to us as a national charity helping people struggling to make ends meet. Job loss, illness or bereavement can cause a real financial crisis. We give practical help to get people back on track. Whether you're thinking of having a baby, trying to get out of an unhappy relationship or just unsure what benefits you may be entitled to, we can help. Visit turntous.org.uk welcome to the Women's Radio station supporting Women's well being. Women's Radio station can give voice to your brand. With a wide range of sponsorship opportunities, including individual programs, we can tailor your experience for you. For more information on how you can sponsor a Show, go to womensradiostation.com Women's radio station supporting Women's well being.