Trending With Dr. Pam Spurr – Overtones, Samantha Tomlin, Tru Powell

Hello and welcome. I'm Dr. Pam Spur and you're here with me on the trending with Dr. Pam show. Every fortnight on both the men's and women's radio station, we look at the trends that the politicians and celebrities are setting and we see how they relate back to our lives with my always amazing guests. However, today we are dumping the trends because my first guest, it's going to be all about getting to know them. So let me just tell you a little bit about them. They are a multi platinum selling group, they've had six studio albums. They're known for their exquisite vocals and their distinctive style and they have their 10 year anniversary tour coming up at the end of this year and we'll be finding out where you can get tickets for that. So if you want to check out the Overtones on social media, they're heovertones and we'll be getting, you can get tickets at ticket X and I'm sure there's other places you'll be able to get them. And I'm delighted to welcome the Overtones. Now we have Jay, Mike, we also have Mark and Darren. Hello. We've got two of you. Hey guys, thank you for joining me today. I'm really well, I mean I'm actually ecstatic to see the four of you. I'm so thrilled because I know you guys are so busy, you have your rehearsals, do your own social media lives, you've got the tour coming up. So the very first thing I'm going to ask you though before we get into the kind of the music is, it's locked down still and everybody wants to know how are you each coping with lockdown? We're not, you know, you know, the Overtones, you know, us as people, we're very positive, positive kind of guys and, and any, any kind of situation we're thrust into, we try and, and deal with it as positive as possible. But I have to say this, this third lockdown is, is tough. It's a, this one is a toughie. I know that. You know, I know Jay will probably talk to you about homeschool in a minute and, and Kerry and I, my wife and I have got our little lad Max, which is, is throwing up certain kind of challenges with being kind of stuck at home. But you know, it's, it's, it's. Yeah, it's a learning experience. It is absolutely a learning experience and it's tough but you know, we're getting through it, we're getting through it together. Well, that is brilliant. And what about Jay, the homeschooling, it's an absolute nightmare. Totally agree with Mike. You know, with parenting in the pandemic, it's just, it's just extra level hard, you know what I mean? It's juggling the homeschooling with, you know, a full time job and a two year old at the same time. It's just so difficult. And like, you know, thoughts go out to, you know, single parents out there that are trying to juggle everything because we're struggling and I, I've got an amazing partner who does a wonderful job to allow me to try and do what I do, you know, so it's, but it's been really, really difficult. But you know, fingers crossed we're, you know, we can get out of it soon and we can get back to a little bit of normality. At the moment the kids are on half term so there's no four or five assignments to do every single day. I feel like I had this conversation the other day that I feel like the schools have got better at lockdown and, and that's a really good thing. But also what it's done is it's kind of put more pressure on to the parents to kind of homeschool, you know, go through, go through those assignments with their kids and stuff. And again whilst you, you're doing a full time job. It's, it's really tricky. It's really tricky. So I was gonna say Charlotte Lamb has said it's super tough and she's had her first co vaccine. That's, that's great. Well done Charlotte. Coming on with Charlotte and, and another Charlotte, Charlotte Miles. Carol Anna Marie says she likes the painting behind me. She doesn't care about you guys. Helen of course saying I'm ready for normality. And I've got to do a massive shout out to Helen because she has come up with some of the questions I'm going to ask you guys. Be careful Helen, but I want to hear from Darren and Mark. So what, what's this third lockdown like for each of you? I think like Mike said. Sorry Darren. Yeah, it's a lot, it's a lot tougher I think you know, for many different factors I guess one of them being the weather. You know, the first lockdown was in summer and I feel really lucky to have the garden and that really got me through the first lockdown. So yeah, it's been really tough with the shorter days and being cooped inside. We got a puppy as well recently at Christmas so that's been both a Challenge and also an absolute joy as well. So that's definitely been keeping me busy. He's called Degsy. Is his name with a G. Degsy. Oh, my God. Yeah, Degsy. So it's. It's basically short for Derek, and we call him Degsy and he's Derek, really. Well, officially, this is an exclusive. Dr. Palm. Yeah, his official name is Derek. Derek. He called your dog Derek. About this. Derek. So what do you think, Darren? You're gonna be furious, Mark. You know what, Pam? I'm kind of obsessed with my little puppy. Her name's Binky. Oh, Mark. You see that? She understood straight away. Anyway, when. When me and Mark were discussing the name for his dog, he said, degsy. And I said, like, you what there? And he went, degsy. And I said to him, you do know every time you say to someone his name's Degsy, they're gonna say, what? And. And that's exactly what happened. Maybe I should stick with Derek then. Maybe that's simpler. Whatever he's called is beautiful. Anyway, Darren, can I ask you, do you have a tip for people who are finding it hard this third lockdown? What would your tip be? But I'm one to kind of very much promote being active and getting out there and doing some exercise, because I've. I found this one tough. You know, they kind of get tougher as they go on. The summer one was. Was fine. I'd go as far to say that personally, I actually enjoyed it. You press pause. The sun was shining. You know, you could go out for walks in the sun. The weather has a big difference. Big. A big change on my mood. I'm someone that's affected by the weather. So when. So when. When the sun's shining, literally, I'm. I just feel like a different person. But, sorry, going back to your question, I think you need to get out into the open. I think you need to get outside, breathe in some fresh air, and go for a run if you can. A jog, a walk, whatever means of getting around that's accessible to you. I think it's really, really important to go and get active. And Janet says she loves watching Daz do his ab sessions. Yeah, I started doing five days a week, my 15 minute ABS blast, just to kind of help myself as well as helping everyone else. Trying to. Trying to get the abs in to get the abs popping for the summer. Because, Pam, before we know it, summer will be here. So I need to get my abs popping for sure. 5 30. The overturned Instagram let's do it. And the lovely Anna Kennedy says hello here. This is. And Helen's saying, yes, absolutely, Daz. Now I've got to say I'm celebrating you guys being with me. So I know my producer Signer has a clip of Celebration, so let's have a little bit of celebration. I think he's got it ready. Is it coming? Maybe I've caught him off card. Put a pound in the jukebox. Hey, yeah, I need to put that money in. There's a party going on right here. A celebration. We got a party of five. We going celebrate your party with you. Come on, Let's all celebrate and have a good time. We go celebrate and have a good time. Oh, sounds lovely. It's a little bit. I love you guys doing this celebration, but the sound is a bit over the airwaves today. That's what I love about you guys. And when I saw you like a year ago, Christmas is just the most happy times. And yes, you do the soulful romantic songs too, but your happy songs like that are just incredible. Now what I want to ask you, first question, and this was one that Helen suggested and I don't know the answer. How did you get the name the Overtones? Go on, Darren. Yeah, go on, Darren. I actually did an interview about this yesterday and I was actually just googling different words to do singing and harmonizing and the word overtone came up. And, you know, there's a complicated explanation of what that word actually means, but basically it's just different layers of sound, which basically means harmonizing in simple terms. So I just thought, you know what, that's perfect because that's what we're about, singing in harmony, creating that nice old school sound. So you stick a the in the beginning and then it's got that old school sound to it. The Overtones were born. There you go. I love it. I love it. Brilliant answer. And I was going to say Janet is asking, I hope the Concord gig goes ahead in April, maybe. You guys, do you have that info yet or is it wait and see? I think, I think, look, we're waiting and seeing at the moment that the gig is on. Let's see what, what Mr. Mr. Boris says on Monday. We're all hoping. We're all desperate to get back on stage so, you know, we're as desperate as our fans are to see us. So, you know, at the moment it's happening, we'll. We'll see what the news comes up with. But do you think Boris will actually say, and the Overtones. The concourse can happen. I think he should. I've had a word. I've had a word with him and hopefully he's going to listen to me this time to get him to the gig. Anna has said that she met the Overtones at Tesco Mum of the Year and you were amazing. So that was probably going back a couple years. That's a few years ago. Yeah. Yeah, that was good. See, all those things, if you start performing, when you just go and spread a little happiness doing things like that, all that's gone. This is, you know, it's just really tough. I mean, I. I hate this. I hate Covid. Okay, just put that out there. I want to ask each of you. I'm going to start with Jay on this one. What was your backup plan if you didn't become a singer? Yeah, I suppose the. I. I was sort of, as, you know, Pam, I. I sort of got into music quite fortuously. Fortuitously, really. You know, I got injured playing rugby, I got drunk and decided to buy a guitar. And then when I was injured, I started singing and. And so that's how I sort of got into music. So I suppose if I. If I wasn't doing music, I'd probably still be in the military. I'd still be in the Navy, in all honesty. That, or obviously radio, which, you know, which. Which I do. So, yeah, the navy, probably. Oh, I'd love that. You know, that's a good, good plan B, if you, you know, if it came to that. Okay, it's not going to come to that. Yeah, actually. Actually trained as a dancer, so I went to dance school as a kid and so I was kind of lucky enough to have a career doing that for around 10 years before. Yeah, before we ended up signing with the Overtone. So feel really lucky to have kind of had, you know, a stab at like a second career doing something that I absolutely love. So. Yeah. Wow, that's. That's fantastic. I mean, I'm really rubbish at dancing, but I still have fun doing it, but I'm always in awe of people who have done it professionally. Oh, Dr. Palm, I can't even. I can't even touch my toes now. Palm, I've seen you in the audience dancing at our gig. You can move. Doing a bit of mum dancing. And Mike, what would your plan B have been? Well, you know what, when we were. When we were struggling band, and I make no secret of the fact that just before we got signed, I was. I was kind of broken in terms of the industry, the the struggle was kind of really, really hurting me, kind of like emotionally and financially. So. And it was the last push. Like I, I had lunch with Darren and Darren was like, listen, just one last push. One last push. But I don't know. I actually don't know if the boys know this, but when, when I had the lunch with Darren saying one last push, one last push, which turned out to be the big record deal with Warner Brothers, I, I had, I already had at home ready for, already filled in, ready to send off my application form for the police force. Oh, wow. Another great question. I did not know that. Yeah. Whether or not I would have got in or not, I don't know. But that was what I was planning to do if, if I wasn't singing. Goodness. The exclusives have coming out left right for Jay's exclusive. I was gonna say, if we ever do this again, you're gonna have to come in the costumes. That Navy police dancer. Okay, Darren, what is your costume going to be? What was your plan B? I was that far away, Dr. Pam, from being a male escort. Really? No, I'm joking. I'm joking, I'm joking. I was just thinking what that outfit would have been that I would have turned up in. I. I'll be honest with you, there wasn't a plan B. When I was, when I was young, I was obsessed with football and I was kind of heading down that route. But, but once I decided that I wanted a career in music, there wasn't a plan B. I was going to literally just keep going until I made it. There was no other choice. I kind of had this goal in mind and when I set my mind to something, I achieve it. So, yeah, there wasn't a plan B, so I would have still been trying. Now I did do every job you can imagine though. But they were by no means a choice of career. From spraying perfume to working in clothes shops, to being an awful waiter at high end events. Yeah, music was the only thing I wanted to do well. And isn't it cool the way Mike has remembered how 10 years ago you said one last push? And right now, with all the advice I'm tending to give people, a lot of parents contact me about the homeschooling, about relationships, people who are lonely. And I just say, you know, give it one more day of what you're trying, or here's a new plan, but you need someone kind of telling you that. And so, you know, that's what you were saying to Mike. You know, one last push. Don't become a Bobby for that. And, you know, it was, it was, you know, somebody like that. I needed somebody like Darren because, you know, it, it, I was really struggling, you know, and I was struggling financially and I was struggling emotionally because of that and you know, it was, it was all kind of getting on top of me and, and we'd already spent several years kind of trying to make it and lots of doors slammed in our faces and promises that never came to fruition. So, you know, I needed somebody like Darren to say, come on, mate, just give it one last chance. And, and equally, you know, I, I say a lot as well in, in interviews and things like, one of the best bits of advice that I ever got was from my dad, who, bless him, bank of Mum and Dad sent me, sent me some money to help. Help tide me over for a while and, and again, this was shortly before we, we got signed. This was probably about six months before we got signed. Yeah. And with, with that, in that envelope of money envelope, a check was a little note that just said, keep on keeping on, you know, probably one of the best bits of advice. Oh, yeah, yeah, I love them. They're good. Now, Janet Turner said. Just a dicky bow, Daz. Yeah, okay. You know, that's all the costume you need if we ever do this again. No problem, that can be arranged. And Helen is saying that she loves these answers. Charlotte is saying how I first met the lads ten years ago at this morning garden party party for the royal wedding. Wow. Oh, wow. So you guys bring back lots of memories too. Now, let's see. I was going to ask what your first job after school was. Who wants to start with that? Yeah, I can go first. Okay. Okay. Sorry, dad, again. Yeah, I remember my first job was working as a pot wash. Actually a Mexican restaurant. Very glamorous. I do remember guacamole and tacos. Well, yeah, Every break time you'd have a Mexican meal because that's all there was. So, yeah, I did get a little bit sick of Mexican food. But I do remember that one of my jobs was to cook the tortillas into nachos. And I used to think that I was a chef because I was doing that. It's like, I'm a chef now. Yeah. Anyway, that was my first job. Oh, that's so sweet. Okay, Daz, what was your first job after school? I am. I didn't know I wanted to do and I didn't really like school, so I was happy to leave. But I literally was kind of in between football and getting into music, so I Just worked for my dad, who was a builder, interior designer. He fitted all the, you know, all the plaster work, the covey and the ceiling roses, the data. So I did that. And looking back on it now, it wasn't so bad. But at the time I really didn't like it. And I was looking at my watch all day saying, dad, when can I go home? When can I go home? Well, listen, mate, I've got some DIY over here. Can you come give me a hand? I'll put my bow tie on. I'll be around in, in five hours. And Jay, what was your first job after school? Or did you get straight in the navy? Maybe? Yeah. Do you know, I had a couple of jobs that sort of tied me over because I joined the Navy at 16. But it was like before I went there because we finished and then I had to wait until I was 16. So I kind of worked in a garage for a little bit, fit in tires. And then I actually went over to Ballinar in County Mayo to work with my dad. So my dad was. My dad was a project manager over on this Coca Cola plant with this engineering, this construction company. And so he got me laboring. But the thing was, like, he was the boss of the site. So we had to keep the fact that he was the boss of the site from the lads that I was laboring with because we obviously didn't want me to get any stick and all that sort of stuff. And I absolutely loved it. Like living with my dad, like living the dream over in, over in Ireland, it was just amazing. And then, and then I joined the navy, so. But yeah, I look back at it fondly like those, those three, four months in County Mayo in Ireland was wonderful. You can join dad because there's some laboring to be done in my garden, which is just a ruin after the snow. Okay, Mike, what was your first job? School. Well, you know, you know what, Pam? I'll join in with the laboring as well because the, the day after my last GCSE exam, I started working on a building site as a, as a, an electrician's mate and Sparky, all I remember was how much of a rude awakening it was. Like, you know, this school kid literally just finished GCSEs the day after up at the cracker door to get onto this building site even before it was light. And, and I remember on the first day, the, the electrician that I was laboring for, they caught, they affectionately called him Greasy Jim. Right. And I, I remember he, he gave me a Drill. And you know, I'm 16, skinny little lad gave me this drill and he said, right, I want you to put drill those holes I've marked. Okay, great. So I drilled into this wall and the. The drill bit hit a steel support in the wall and the grill whipped around and it cut the tip of my finger off. Just the skin? Just skin? Yeah. But it was. For me, it was a pretty nasty cut. It was like a big bit of flesh hanging off my finger. So I'm like, I'm starting to go pale and faint and I'm holding my finger and I'm like, jim, Jim, I need to go to hospital. I remember he grabbed my hand and he went, hold on. Went into his pocket, got some blue insulation, tape, electrical, wrapped my finger up, grit in there and all, and went, you're all right, get on with it. And I would just be like, oh, wow, this is the real world now. Yeah, this is the real world. Mommy's not there with a plaster and a kiss. You see, Jim was not going to give you a little pat on the head. That's why we call him Greasy Mate. Now. That's the other reason. Now we're gonna just listen to a little bit more music before we get on to music with you guys. So I've got a clip of you to me or everything. If Sila the producer can please bring up the clip, that would be great. Look at that. Oh, the sound of your wonderful music is being distorted. Stop the wind from falling. If you'd ask. Again, I love your music, but the sound quality not working very well. Too bad you guys can't just sing it. You got the picture. It's a wonderful. You guys, you such a wonderful cover of that. What I was going to ask you next was is there a song you've wanted to cover but for some reason you haven't been able to? Maybe the rights are impossible to get or. So you've got a really bad thing going on with that. With that link. Apologies to you guys because it's a brilliant live link that Jay sent me. It's just not working on the system today. There must be a lot. One of our mics, isn't it? Yeah. Something happen. Let's mute individually, Okay? Yes. Always Mike. It's always you. Okay, Always Greasy Mike. I can still hear the cracking now, Mike. When you muted, it was perfect. So when you're not talking, Mike, just mute. That's a good idea. Good plan. Okay, now we should. So we should have heard one of your beautiful covers. So, yeah, my question Was, I'll go to you, Mark, what cover would you really like to do that, you know, maybe because of rights or for some reason you're not able to do it? Is there something, though, you'd love to do? Do you know what? I'm going to be a little bit cryptic here, but I've actually covered a song that I've always wanted to cover for the last 10 years on our new album. Obviously, I'm not allowed to tell you what it is, but all that I can say is it's an absolute corker. And it's one of those songs that you think, how have the overtones never done this song? So I can't wait to reveal what that song is. But we're open to guesses if anyone wants to guess. Well, let's wonder if anybody will comment and guess what that song is going to be. Jay, is there a song you know, you'd love to do, but you know it hasn't happened yet, or you think there's a problem that you couldn't get the rights or. Yeah, it's a tricky one, isn't it, because you kind of almost don't want to say it just in case there's a chance that in the future we will actually get it done and do it. I think I was like, I was proper made up, as Mark says, and we promise it's not a plug at all, but some of the records on the new album are kind of some. Some of my favorite songs of all time. And so the fact that we've kind of. We've done those and actually, you know, it sounds. It sounds terrible to say, but, you know, to listen to them and go, wow. Like, you know, we've. We've done a really good job that. And we think that people are going to love that. It feels really like, I want to know the. I want to know the song. It's good. Well, do you know what we put in? We often have the sort of discussion, song discussions all the time about what we're going to do and how we're going to do it. Of course, writing new, original music is something that's right up on our priorities and what we want to do. But often the kind of final decision is kind of like, okay, let's just ask everybody else. Let's just get it on socials and ask everybody else. In which case it's usually the worst possible idea because we get back, like, thousands of different ideas that completely scramble our heads that we already scrambled. But it's a really good indicator Actually, and the boys will say as well that, you know, genuinely like everybody, all of the toners and, and all of our wonderful supporters usually come up trumps with some absolutely hoofing ideas. And on this record there's certainly a few that they've selected. So, yeah, it's going to be really cool. Okay, well, I'm going to leave that question for Darren and Mike. But Mike, maybe you can tell me, do you guys ever fall out over song choices or have a little bit of a route or is it always friendly, You know, you know. Oh, the song sounds quite good now, right, so. Excuse me. Oh, nightmare. No, fuckly. You know what? You know what, Pam? I, I, of course, look, from. Whoops, now we've lost the sound. Told you he wasn't the tech man. Pam, You paused, mate. Yeah, you paused. We didn't get to hear the answer. If you guys thought, I think we'll go to Darren while Mike sorts out his tech, I can know. Yes. So what was the answer to? Do you guys ever fall out about it? Is it tricky? Or do you, you guys have a good vibe when you're talking about these things. Max. Yeah. Do you know what? Sometimes, look, there's four guys and we're all very opinionated, especially Jay. But no, no, we don't argue. Obviously, we will speak our mind. We're not, we're not, we're not manufactured puppets. We, we all have a say in what we do. We take it very seriously. So we have. Sorry, Mike, can you press mute, mate? I'm trying. We all, we all put our suggestions forward. And look, if we have to cast a vote, we cast a vote. But I wouldn't say we have arguments. Just, just maybe loud, loud conversations. That's a good description. Wonderful. Dr. Pam, if I could just give you a bit of a visual about what usually happens when we have those discussions about songs. You see, like, what will usually happen is we'll all come to the table with maybe two suggestions about what we think we should do. And then what happens is one person will say, you know, what's what? One song that they think, and then they'll leave what they really want as their second song. But what they'll do is kind of really paint a picture and really build it up to like, you know, what the crowd are doing, what the dance moves are. And then, then what happens is the, the next person kind of tries to outshine that idea by going a little bit further. Now we're kind of not in a theater now. We're actually in arena and what's happening is we've got a full orchestra and so we all try and outdo each other to try and sell the songs best. Hey, that's funny you said that because we've got got one more song to choose for the album and I've actually made a music video to present to you. Oh, I love it. We could have seen that today. But obviously that's going to be between you guys. We're almost out of time. But can I just ask one last quick question? Have you ever chat anyone out by actually bursting into song? Mark, do you want to go with that one? Oh, I don't know. I mean, I, I guess I met my current partner in a nightclub, so I can only assume after however many beverages that I was probably singing along to the song, whatever song was playing. So we'll go with yes on that one. Cool. And what about you, Mike? I, I, hopefully you can hear me was the question. What was the question? Have you ever chatted anyone else by bursting into song? Of course he has. You know, you know what, I, I, not necessarily, but I met my wife during, so, so obviously I, I did some singing then and even then, even after the singing, she still liked me. So that was good. Oh, that's a lovely story. And Jay, did you sing to your other half when you first 100, Pam? It's the only thing I have in my locker really. You know, she was, she was this incredible, you know, incredibly wonderful looking human and, and I was a, a grot bag from the navy. So, you know, naturally I, I sort of positioned the guitar sort of very close to the front door. So when she came in she was like, oh my gosh, is that yours? I was like, oh, this whole thing, you know. Oh, no, I shouldn't really. Here's some Tracy Chapman. So, yeah, I certainly sort of leaned on it a little bit. And, and actually I, I must say that, you know, in the same way that we were talking about earlier about, you know, leaning on each other for the support that we need to sort of try and survive 10 years in this industry, for me, it's one thing that I've actually really loved about being with the boys, but, but also I kind of had that from Victoria, my wife, early on. You know, she was the one that really helped drive me to, to stay in the game and keep pushing for what I believed could happen. And you know, it's wonderful now to be with the lads and killing it. So yeah, I was going to just ask you before you run out of time. It's funny you should say that because my girlfriend's got a lovely voice, bless her, like she's got an amazing singing voice. And we used to joke in the early days of dating, we used to joke that one day we'll kind of travel around America in a campervan and gig in the bars, just us doing it. And it'll be called the Romance Tour. And we've got this funny little thing that we talk about, but I think she's serious about it where for me it's a bit of a joke, but we'll see. Oh, I love this. Now, just a quick one. Where do we get the tickets for the tour? Well, you can just go, just go to Google. Just go to Google and put in the Overtones 10 Year Anniversary Tour and you'll find tickets, you know, tickets are available. You can head to our website, Theobatones tv, you'll see all the links there. But honestly it's really easy. Just go to Google, put the Overtones 10 Year Anniversary Tour tickets and you can go and get them there. And we'll really look forward to seeing you there. We're really excited about doing it. November, December, we're taking over and we're bringing back the feel. Good. Because it's something I think we all need. Oh, come on. Have a great night of us, guys. It's going to be a special show. Oh, gosh. And if you go ahead in April, the Concord, I am going to be there for sure. I need a lift, like the kind of lift you guys give. Thank you so much, Mark J, Mike, Darren, you've been amazing. You're the Overtones, a lot of your fans. Thanks again to Anne Marie, Charlotte, Helen, Carol, another Charlotte. There's so many of them. Lots of love, guys. Take care and have a great day. Lots of love. You guys. Bye. So that's the Overtones on social media. You can find them at the Underscore Overtones. And I'm going to go straight on to my next guest who is a parent partner for the National Autistic Society and she's an ASD mum, that is the autistic spectrum disorder or autism spectrum disorder. She's also a model and actor and on social media you can find her Ms. SamTomlin, that's on Twitter and on Instagram. She is Samantha Tomlin and I'm delighted that Sam is going to join me now to talk about homeschooling. Hello, Samantha. Hi, Pam, how are you? I'm really well, just. And I'm on cloud nine after having the Overtones with me. And now moving on to you. How are you? How are you coping with. The sun is out. So, I mean, I think I'm a bit like yourself, Pam. I'm guided by the seasons. The sunshine comes out suddenly, just everything is better, everything's more hopeful. Just. There's just more opportunities, there's more things to do. It's another place to go, the outside. So, happy day today. Yes, it is. Now, you, of course, have two sons and the younger is on the spectrum. Now, you've been homeschooling, of course. Now, first I want to ask, what was the first lockdown like when you first had to homeschool? I mean, because it was obviously brand new, you know, what was that like? It was tricky. I mean, I think it was tricky no matter whether you had a child on the spectrum or otherwise. It was. Nobody really knew what was going on. It was frightening, I think, for the kids. For me personally, initially, it felt like, okay. I mean, they were just like, wow, we've got a holiday. They didn't sort of, you know, with the younger one, he wasn't listening to the news. They did really. They did an amazing job at his school, actually sort of talking them through what was going on, what might happen. It's a sort of a staple for someone on the spectrum to be sort of as clear as you can to sort of map out what's going to happen, as long as you know that that's a sort of a possibility. Some children are okay with possibilities, others need a sort of a defined. This is it, this is the schedule. We're not going to budge from this because if we budge from it, it's going to be a nightmare. But we sort of coped. It was okay. It was. It was. It was tricky, sort of. My older son, I mean, he's 17, so he was just. He wanted to be out with his friends, he wanted to be at the gym. The younger one, he's. He's cool. He likes being at a home because he knows what he does at home. Yes. It's a safe space for him. He's happy he missed his friends. The work scenario, Yeah. I mean, that's not. That wasn't fantastic. The first lockdown, I must say, for the schools, I think we're getting used to it. So it was tricky for them, especially because they've got a lot of children there that have got underlying health conditions and that have got parents that work. They're key workers, they work for the nhs, so they had to be in school. But we did it, we managed it. We're all still here. I know. And you know, I have to say, hats off to parents like you suddenly thrown into this. I know what it's like. One of my children had severe physical illness, pulmonary lung disorder, and was in hospital so much of her childhood that I had to keep the, you know, the homework going and whatever. So I know, you know, that's different because I, I could go out and about, I could go to the hospital and be with her, but I still had delays at the school constantly. And that was stressful enough, which is why I just bow down to all your parents now who are doing this when you're isolated too. Now, I was wondering what you found was what was the most positive aspect for you, you know, because, you know, we can always talk about what was. It has been the trickiest. But what, what's been actually a positive? Well, the positives are just spending more time, like everyone would, with the children, like the boys. I mean, if I can ever drag the elder one off of his, like his gaming machine, he's. I mean, he's doing his A level. So to be honest, he's working very, very hard at the moment. First lockdown, he didn't do any work. But this time he knows this is how he's going to get his exam results. So he's really got his head down. But it's with the younger one, with Henry, it's. I mean, he's really come out of himself. I've actually found it a really positive experience and I think he has too in. It sounds strange, but socially he seems to have developed massively. Which you think he would almost regress. Yeah, absolutely. Now he's older now, I think I would found it much harder when he was younger. So all the parents out there that have got younger children on the spectrum, I can see, I mean, I know how hard it was just to get them to sit down, to do a little bit of homework, let alone, you know, we're going to write a story, we're going to do something here. This is, this has got to be productive. But it's just a bit in a joy to sort of like have them here and not to sort of see them fleeting out of the door in the morning and then back at night. Because it's sort of. They start really early, half seven. My youngest gets on his bus to school and doesn't get home till 4. So it's, it's been lovely, it's been positive to sort of see that new side of him, the social side and just to be with them a bit more. Yeah, I think a lot of parents too are finding that and interesting. A lot of fathers who are, you know, normally, I don't want to sound sexist or anything, but often they're the ones who go for long hours. Mum with especially younger children is maybe at home or working part time. And a lot of fathers are reporting that actually the time locked down with their children has been fantastic for them. I wanted to say one of my friends who has a child on the spectrum has found that his anxiety has gone down because of probably what you're saying about the home routine for him is really good. Of course, she's had worries about when he first went back in the summer, when schools were back again, that it escalated again, but then seemed to actually again stay lower than pre. All of this. I don't know if that's something to do with that individual child or maybe for certain children on the spectrum, having more time at home for a while has been helpful to anxiety. Yeah. I mean, that's a really interesting point because they usually say once you've met one child on the spectrum, you met one child on the spectrum. But that's not really the case because there's an underlying sort of trait that they all have that they've all got together that you can sort of, you see, of course, in varying degrees. But that's exactly what I found with Henry when he went back. I thought, oh, he's just not going to want to go, he'll want to stay here. But his teachers just said to me that, like, what's happened? You know, he's just. He's engaged. Yeah, he was engaged with the other children. Usually he's very much. He. He's an insular person. He stays on his own, he likes his own company. But he started joining in with the games and always putting his hand up and he's just got a lot more confidence. And it's sort of, initially, as your friend says, he found it a little bit tricky, you know, up again or on the bus again, all there's people around me everywhere again. And then we've got to wear masks. I mean, come on. Yeah, you know, this was. Again, so happy. He's older, but when he was younger, his main issues that he had were all sensory. Yeah. So anybody that's got a child on the spectrum that has. Henry has got sensory processing disorder, which is the sort of severe side of the sensory issues. But again, as he's got older, we've managed to sort of combat that, and we've eased it slightly. But the younger children, I mean, I can't see that they put a mask and they don't even want to put their coat on. Well, you get the opposite. They put the coat on and then it never comes off. I was gonna say, Helen's commented saying, hey, Samantha, spending time is so important, you know, and it is, you know, you've had that. That additional time, which is a good thing now. Now, what I want to get from you is any advice you might. Any few tips you might have for parents who are homeschooling, whether with children on the spectrum or not. Just. What. What do you think? What's helped you to actually now make a success of it? I think it was. It was mostly sort of acceptance of the fact that, you know, pick your battles. It's not going to be perfect. None of us are teachers. I'm certainly not. And, you know, you've got to make it an enjoyable experience. So if you get maths in English done, I mean, I feel that that's an absolute win. I would say that's a double. Yeah. You know, these. These parents that have got them, the kids up and they're all doing Joe wicks, like at 9 o' clock in the morning, whistling our pajamas. I mean, that's, you know, it's not happening. We rpe. We do it every day. We take the dog for a walk, we go out on the scooter. Our exercise is rpe, but again, it's sort of. It's channeling into what the school offers you as well. I think there's, you know, our school, luckily enough, has been amazing. It took them a while. It took them until the end of the second lockdown. But now, you know, we go on, we log on. There's live lessons every day, there's calming lessons. So we've got mindfulness, which wouldn't be appropriate, obviously, for state school, but there's many ways to sort of just. I think for us it was the routine. Like I said to start with, I was, you know, we were very clear, we worked in the same timetable. He would have done at school, but we can be a bit flexible because, you know, sometimes the sun's out or there's a bit of snow, so we can sort of develop it. I love what you're saying, the flexibility, finding out what timings work for you. You know, counting is a win if you get a couple of the crucial topics done. So thank you for that. I do want to ask also, as an actor and model in lockdown what's happened with auditioning and that sort of thing? Is it all gone by the wayside? Have you done some socially distanced things or. Well, to start with, it was. I mean, it was horrific. Literally. I just thought, well, that's it, my career is now done. But also it was a bonus because I had to be at home. I couldn't have left Henry for that entire amount of time anyway. But it was sort of. Yeah. I mean, I personally didn't want to go for any castings or auditions because my mum's in her 70s. So I had that vibe. I was like, wow. You know, and also with Henry because he's got so many children in his class that have got underlying health conditions. So I was like, no. But the industry did shut down, I mean. And it's still horrific, to be honest. It's. It started to open up in the summer. I did a bit of filming pre Christmas and that was like COVID test every other day for two weeks filming. And most of that was just fitting of costumes. The costumes had to be cleansed every day. Everybody had to wear a mask and a visor onto set. And then when it was time, as soon as that, like literally 30 seconds before action, someone had run around and you had your own plastic folder to put your shield in. And it was like that. And it was amazing because I had so many Covid tests and that whole time, I mean, that was. It was wonderful. That was Warner Brothers. They were so good. I felt really safe. Yeah. That they're adhering to it. Yeah. Again, it's now shut down everything. I mean, the theater is the one I worry about the most. I've only ever done theater once in my life. It's not, you know, it's not for the faint hearted but it's just how are they going to get back? I worry for them. Well, listen, we've kind of run out of time. You of course also are involved in Wingman. I do a column for you. You're like, me too. We love you. Do the column for you, the dating column. You're helping create this wonderful wingman dating app for to help get involved in their profile. So highly recommend people do that so people can find you on Twitter issamtomlin. Instagram is @Miss Samantha Tomlin, your full name. So good to have you on the show and having so much. Lots of love, darling. Bye. Bye. Take care. Thank you. Bye. That was some great advice from Sam, wasn't it? For parents who are homeschooling now. I'm so excited My next guest is back for a second time. He is a multi award winning entrepreneur. He's a regular commentator on things like gmb. You will recognize him and I'm delighted to say you can find him@TruePal.com but that's T R uh, so TruePal.com and on social media, Twitter and Instagram, it's RuPaul. And Tru should be ready to join me now. And we're going to be talking about inspiring youth in these difficult times. So I hope to get him up just, just about now. And we've got lots. There he is. Hi. I thought we've been having tech problems. You know, this happens with digital radio. It does, it does. How are you? I'm really well. I'm so glad you could come back. How are you doing? Thank you. Really, really well. I know because you've got so many projects happening right now, it's just unbelievable. And congratulations because now you're working with the Hippodrome in Birmingham. Yeah. Yes, Birmingham Hippodrome. I've been appointed to the board of directors. I'm really excited about that. It's going to be really interesting and it's an exciting time to be joining. Exciting and challenging to be honest, given the circumstance, but I'm really excited about it. That is so cool. Now, I want to talk to you about inspiring youth because in different parts of your career, you've been involved with young people and I just wondered, how have you found that? So for me, working with young people is part of my DNA. And I think I've always learned or I've always been somebody who, if I'm not inspiring, then I don't believe my work is done. So, yeah, so I always try. Everything I do, I always try and inspire the next generation. I think it's incumbent upon us as leaders to inspire so the younger generation can think and believe that they can achieve anything that they want to achieve. And I think that's innate in me and that's my job and that's part of my purpose and my why. I love that. It's amazing that I didn't realize you considered it sort of part of your purpose and in your DNA. We need people like you. Because I feel, you know, as adults, this whole Covid situation the last year has been hard on us. But with young people, do you think with the young people you've come in contact with, has it been even harder for them? 100%. 100%. I think as adults, when we are faced with uncertainty, we kind of have the Experience to manoeuvre. And we kind of have the experience to be resilient. But I think with young people, they're still experiencing life and for something such as Covid, I think is a big hit for them to have, particularly because they're not, not mentally mature enough to deal with it. So I think it's our job to provide that support and to provide that reassurance. But no, I, I, I, I really feel it. I feel it for those taking exams, I feel it for those who are out of school. I feel it for those who have their routine just turned upside down. And I think that's important. I think young people need routine. You know, I agree, factual, you know, scientifically proven, they need routine. And when their routine has been disrupted, when they're taken away from their friends, their extracurricular activities, their schooling, their teachers, the norm that they know and have accepted for many years, and when that's removed from, you know, from them overnight and it's kind of left them quite idle to do nothing, I think that's when they get mischievous and that's when they start to do things that they shouldn't really do. And, and I, I'm speaking from, you know, real life examples. And you know, my daughter who's 17, you know, if you, if she's not in a routine, then she'll probably get involved in the wrong crowd. She'll probably be doing, you know, stuff on, on online that she's not meant to be doing. So we have to try and give as much routine as possible to keep. And it's interesting you mentioned routine like that because I think a lot of parents feel, oh, you know, if I give routine that I'm just going to be like, seem like I'm just so strict and whatever. But I totally get what you're saying. I believe routine is really important. And what you said about the youth taking this harder because they're less mature mentally. I also think because young people live in the moment more than we do. And as a psychologist, I'm always talking about mindfulness with my clients and adults to be more mindful like a young person is. And that's why I almost think when they kind of live in the moment and suddenly the moment is just like totally different. Can't see their friends don't get to go to school like they should unless they have a special need or something. And I think you're absolutely right. They're almost, their brains aren't prepared, they don't have the skills. We have to kind of get through this now what do you think about. You see, I know even before the pandemic the government cut back on things like sure, start community youth groups. Have you seen anything like in your area fill those voids or because of lockdown people can't get out there and like start a football team or whatever. I mean it's, it's crazy. So what we do, we work with young people in performing arts. So we're very creative. So we do creative arts. And, and every week we work with about 100 young people in the physical or we used to pre covered. So we used to work with about 100 young people who used to come to us and we used to teach them vocals, performance, dancing, blah blah, blah. So it wasn't just the teaching of the vocals and the movement and the performance. It was also a familyhood. And very much, you know, we, we were a, we were a family and we still are. And I think when Covid hit that was taken away in an instant. And what was what our routine that we used to meet weekly in the physical kind of was then kind of digitalized. But then one of the things that we, we had to really work out really quickly and wasn't really aware of was digitally digital inclusion. And what do I mean by that? I mean that actually we needed to be inclusive. So it's things like from their background, you know, socio economic backgrounds. Does every young child have access to a device? Exactly. Do they have access to wi fi? But number three, do they even know how to use the device? You know, is there any, any of our young people who are struggling to read if we, you know, we're typing or whatever the case is. So there was a whole host of, I guess issues that we have to be aware of really quickly. So we really had to devise a digital inclusion policy that would help support that we were doing. But what happened was because Covid came around so quickly and even now we approached the government for support with this digital inclusion policy because actually there's more needs here. And even, and even now this hasn't been ratified. It hasn't, you know, digital inclusion still not a thing in Parliament. You know, it's not being looked at and, but we know months, they've had months, this is the problem months to. Everybody heard about last March, April, the young children across the country who didn't have access to laptops and wi fi, someone who might guide them through it. Because if they haven't had a laptop, how do you learn to use it? You know, and so you still haven't had any support from the government. No support at all. So what I mean, we called on private companies and organizations to help support and fill that void, which has been great, but I think the government still hasn't. And I'm not surprised because there's still children out there who are in state schools that don't have a laptop. Yeah, but what's that about again? They've had since last March and April. This is why, you know, this isn't a political program. But I can, I am free to express my disappointment about what's going on, my anger. Before I get too angry, can I just say that Helen has messaged saying, hey, true, she agrees with you. Routine is so important. I think a lot of people will absolutely agree with that and I think a lot of parents struggle with that. As I say, I've met parents who want to be their child's best friend rather than their parent. And yes, as your children get older, they do. My children have got older, they've left school. That you do become more almost like friends, but you're still their parent. You still have to be the person in authority and you still have to lead. You know, when you're a leader, you do that mean that you have to be draconian. It doesn't mean that you, you know, have to be military. It just means that you can lead and still be liked, you can lead and still be respected. You can lead and still have fun. And I think that's just a misconception when dealing with young people and dealing with routine, I think. Yeah. And it's how you deliver it is key. Yeah. Now, what would you say to any parents? How can they maybe if they haven't been instilling routine, maybe they've been really, they've struggled with that. I mean, I was a single parent for a few years after my divorce before I met my, my next husband. He's the last. But I know it's hard as a single mom of young children. So whether a parent single or whatever, what, what would your advice be to maybe parents who are struggling with that whole thing of routine? What are a few tips to maybe help their child, inspire their child? I think firstly, I just want to give a huge congratulation to any single parent out there, be it mum or dad. I think being in a marriage with children is hard enough. So I couldn't imagine what single parents go through. So my hats go off to you and just thank you for all the hard work that you are doing. And secondly, I think any the tips That I will give is sort out the fundamentals first. So by that I mean bedtimes, breakfast times, waking up, lunch times, all of those fundamentals that what children need to, to operate. So those core, core basics sort out first make sure that they're stapled in the diary. So if the child has breakfast at 8, make sure they have breakfast at 8. You know, lunchtime, make sure they have breakfast at that time. Bedtime, make sure they go to bed that same time. Get those core principles down in the diary first. And then as you got those down, then you can start introducing your school timetable. If you're homeschooling so you're gonna. And be realistic, you know, don't think, oh, I need to do homeschooling all day. You know, I only do a maximum of two hours a day homeschooling with my children, maximum, usually between an hour and a half, two hours on a really good day. But I think it's important that we don't over exert ourselves and over exert the children because actually the children probably, probably on a normal school day probably would have if it was one to one, learning probably about maybe an hour, if that, maybe half that. I think that's an excellent point because what you're talking about really is quality, not quantity. And if you know you can give good homeschooling for an hour and a half or two hours max, that's better than you trying to keep at it and go back to it again and again. Totally with that. And I think a lot of people need, need to know that and I really appreciate anyone. We've got time for one quick last tip. One quick one. Yeah. So I would say do that. Make sure all the core principles are down and just have fun like don't be too rigid. Just have with your children. Thank you. Thank you so much. True. I'm so glad you could join me again today. Thank you for having me on one of my favorite shows. So thank you so much. Thank you. Love to love. Bye bye. And True can be found at his website@True TruePal.com and on social media. Thank you for joining me today. Thank you so much for all your messages. Love getting your comments through. I'll be back in a fortnight and tomorrow it is repeated the show on the men's and women's radio stations. You take care of yourself. Until next time.