Health Hacktivators With Dr Alka Patel – Nick Ede, Overcoming Imposter Syndrome And Criticism

You're listening to Health Hacktivators with me, Dr. Alka Patel, on the Womanz radio station. Welcome to Health Hacktivators with lifestyle medicine doctor, GP, and longevity expert Dr. Alka Patel. This show will help you to discover a hidden health hacking code that unlocks your phenomenal potential for an outstanding healthspan, lifespan, and wealthspan. The show features candid conversations with celebrities, influencers, and industry icons real-life stories, and cutting-edge health activating advice that other doctors might not tell you. Discover why now is the time to join the strategic self-care revolution and experience the profound effect this will have on your personal and professional success. Now, here is your host, Dr. Alka Patel. Hi, hey, and hello, health activators. In today's show, I am joined by the warm and wonderful Nick ED. Nick is a pop culture and brand expert. He's been a regular on our TV screens on Good Morning Britain and Sky News, and you'll remember his appearance in the flagship UK TV show Matchmaker. Now, most recently, he's the host and expert of Hello! Magazine's High Street Hits with Andrea McLean, and he's also a royal commentator. So you know that I will be asking Nick about this. And he runs a top PR brand agency East of Eden PR. And to add to his fabulousness, he is a philanthropist and a charity activist. He's a— he's the founder, the founder of the charity events the Global Gift Gala and Style for Stroke. That's just a few to name, because he's helped hundreds of people, hundreds of charity organizations across the UK. And Nick is also host of the podcast Imposter Syndrome, which I cannot wait to get straight into. So let's go. Before we get into today's conversation, please do support today's show sponsor, Youth and Earth. Youth and Earth have a range of products that I love to use myself to supercharge my metabolism, to support my health, and to slow down cellular aging. So just be sure you click the link in the show notes for exclusive offers which Youth and Earth are so generously giving only for listeners of this show. So hello, hello, Nick. It is fabulous to see you again. Hello, hello. Thank you so much for having me. I mean, the last time I saw you, I could see now I had just received these Varifocals. So literally, if you see me doing this, it's— I may be agreeing with you or going like this, it's because I'm just getting used to it. I love that. I thought it was some kind of, you know, AI tech kind of glasses that were kind of doing that whole virtual vision Great. Well, look, at least you can see me, so I'm really grateful for that. But, um, yeah, look, I wanted to dive, um, straight into a particular topic, if that's okay. And I know this is something that you, you speak a lot about, and you've got this whole podcast, the Impodster podcast, which I think is a brilliant play on words. Like, who even came up with that, with that name? You know what I'm like, I'm good with my words, Alka. Brilliant, brilliant. So look, let's talk about imposter syndrome, because I know it's something that you've talked about experiencing yourself and perhaps through a large part of your life. But I've got to say, when people look at you, look at your achievements, they're probably going to be quite baffled that you feel that you've lived life with this shroud of being an imposter through it. So what's the explanation for yourself there? Why do you think that for a large part of your experience, you've, you've kind of been shrouded with this sense of I'm an imposter? Do you know what, that's such a good question because I think it's— I think it came from being quite young. I was told, well, I was told when I was, uh, around about 15, 16 that I was adopted. And I think, you know, when you have that information given to you where when you have lived quite a lot of your sort of, well, obviously your adolescent life and your childhood thinking that your mum and dad are your mum and dad and that your brother is that your brother, and then for that to kind of be sort of taken away from you That then makes you quite insecure and maybe less trusting of any situation or anybody because all the foundations literally went. And so I think that was probably the beginning of it. And I was always quite a high achiever, but I never really understood— I never ever thought I was good enough. My father was a scientist, a very eminent scientist, and my mother had been a performer. And, you know, they're big high achievers and very artistic family, very you know, it was all— it was about career. And I think maybe potentially I always never felt that I could talk to them and tell them what I really wanted. And I remember, uh, being at school and I wanted to be an actor. I'll call you— you know, I still do. One day, you never know, we'll be treading the boards on the West End. But I wanted to be an actor and it was very— it felt like the most important thing to me. But I went to a school, quite a posh public school, and the people— it was so bizarre— but the people who were in the first 15 at rugby they would get given the main parts in the plays or the musicals, whereas I was the one that wanted to be an actor. And I thought, well, surely I should be that person because I'm— that's what I want to do. I don't want to be a rugby player, I don't want to be a prefect, I want to be an actor. Yeah. And I found that always so bizarre. So when I went for auditions, I knew that I was the best person. I knew that I should have been the lead performer at school, but the teachers would give me a funny role or the secondary role or maybe a part in the chorus and say, "Oh, next year you'll be really good for this." So, I have, from a very young age, had this weird kind of almost— what it is, it's you never think you're good enough and you never think you deserve to be where you are. It's quite— I mean, social anxiety syndrome is a real thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, for sure. There's a couple of things you've sort of said there that have really got me thinking already. Already, we're only a few seconds into this and you've got me thinking, Nick. Is, um, this sense of our thoughts become our actions. So when you're describing going to these auditions and in a way feeling that I'm the best one for this part, do you feel, looking back, that the sense you had of I'm an imposter, I'm not good enough, played out and became something that's noticeable, or not really? Because there's something interesting around that, isn't there? Yeah, I think, I think that's actually very true. I, I've done lots of television, as you know, but when I used to work for Lorraine Kelly Show, I I was— I used to always hold the camera people or the sound person stuff if we were doing an outside broadcast. I would always help them out. And one of the producers said to me, you need to stop that because you are becoming too sort of accessible. You're not the star, or you're not the talent. You are kind of being part of everything. And, and I found that very bizarre. I was like, well, I'm a team player, so I want to hang out with everybody and I want to help everyone. That's how I naturally am. Yeah. But perception and the way that people make themselves into— sometimes I think maybe I did the wrong thing and was too helpful, because if I'd gone, actually, no, I'm going to stay here, you do that, I'll stay here, it creates— not— well, it does create a hierarchy, which again is something I don't particularly like. It creates roles for people, and that's important. Yeah, and I get that. I think what I'm hearing is something around identity and values. Like, if you can't show up as the helpful, kind, caring, considerate person that you are, but you're showing up because of this idea and this role and this label that someone else tells you to wear, then obviously you're gonna feel like you're the imposter, right? Yeah, 100%. So for you, going back to being able to show up with your values, who you are, how you hold your compass, what's important to you— was there a time when you felt able to do that in terms of kind of positioning to overcoming imposter syndrome. How did you do that? I don't know if I've actually overcome it, Elke. I think I live with it, and it's something— it's, it's almost like a devil angel on your shoulders. And I always feel that I have it. In a weird way, the insecurity it gives me makes me more ambitious, but also in the other way, um, I feel it has been quite a handicap, and it's, uh, always maybe potentially held me back a wee bit, or it hasn't given me the confidence that I would have wanted to have, or know I've got inside me. But weirdly, it just hasn't— I don't know, it's fair, it's a very bizarre thing. But listen, you know, I, I have been— I've talked in front of hundreds of thousands of delegates, I've met royalty, I've done everything you can think of, I've hosted my own shows, and somehow I've always— I always say that I was born very happy, you know, I wake up happy every day, and You know, God gave me a big personality that, you know, you just can't— you know, you can throw anything at me and I'll still smile. Oh, I love that because that is all about— yeah, there's that inner voice, right? And it's there for, for all of us. But how much do you amplify it? How much space do you give it in your life? Because here you are, and we wouldn't know just even talking right now that there's this kind of inner critic that's sitting there because you've still gone on and achieved what you've achieved. Maybe it wasn't about being an actor, But actually, the journey that you've gone on has brought you here right now. And there's something there to celebrate, isn't there? And I think for people listening who've got this sense of, "I'm not good enough," like, what would you say about not celebrating that feeling, but that acknowledgement of that so that it pushes you, takes you to where you end up? Well, I think in a weird way, you use the— the insecurity to become sort of secure in the fact of that you actually know who you are. So for instance, you know, I'll, you know, I'll be in situations which I'm like, oh my God, this is awful, and I shouldn't— I don't want to be here, but I deserve to be here, but I don't want to be here. And you have this kind of battle inside your brain. But by the time that you've negotiated it internally and you've actually achieved something and you've come out the other end, that achievement and that kind of feeling of, oh my God, I actually did it, and this is great, and I belong here. That actually is such a strong sort of emotion that it really creates a big adrenaline rush, which is exciting. But I think if I was giving advice to people listening to this, I'd say always go with your gut instinct and go with, you know, your brain has— I mean, you know more than I do, but your brain can trick you, but your gut can you know, lead you. And that's what I go with always. Yeah, yeah, I love that because we do say, you know, gut instinct, or I've got butterflies in my stomach, and then we just ignore that, ignore that sensation. Go with that, go with that, 100%. Uh, yeah, brilliant, brilliant advice. Um, and look, you mentioned your parents as well, and being adopted, and you, as you say, your mum was this gorgeous, glamorous, talented singer, and your father the geneticist who, and so worked on Dolly the Sheep and cloning and, and that area, and There's not another one of me, that's for sure. We need more Nicks in the world. Of course we do. But they must have instilled in you as well this sense of working hard and achievement, just by kind of that, that role modeling in a way. So what's your, what's your sense of that role modeling? I call them mirror neurons. You know, we learn from people who are around us, but what do you think about that? Well, I learned a lot. I learned from my parents. I learned about resilience, and I learned about strength. You know, my mum died when I was 23, so it was quite, uh, quite young. It was very sort of pivotal moment in my life. My father had never had anybody else in his life and never, you know, really since he had been in the army had ever cooked for himself or sort of, you know, he was stuck, you know, with two boys, not really, you know, never being kind of alone. And so that was a huge, you know, three boys together is difficult to navigate. We'd lost, like, sort of our matriarch. So that was huge. I hadn't come out, you know, there was a lot going in there. So, but what I learned from— what I learned from my dad was that actually don't judge a book by its cover, and also that you can be really strong and resilient. And he was, like, amazing. When my mum passed away, he found it very difficult to talk to me because I was very similar to her, and he found that kind of triggered him in quite a bad way. My brother, who hadn't particularly been that close to me for quite a few years, became really our kind of father figure in that respect. He took me under his wing. He kind of took my dad under his wing. That kind of family thing has— I think it just taught me resilience. It taught me that you can negotiate stuff yourself. I've never been to see a counselor ever, Alka. This is probably the biggest counseling session I've had in my life. Because I've always been somebody who has been taught pretty early on that you can actually negotiate all of this yourself. You just need to know how you can do it. And my family kind of taught me that. And my mum was very expressive, uh, and she had— unfortunately, she had quite a difficult time. She'd been a singer and she had her vocal cords cut, and so she couldn't really speak particularly well. She couldn't sing. And so she had that frustration and she took that not out on me. She actually wanted me to be a performer and be in because that's where she wanted to go if she'd carried on. So there was lots of, you know, as you get older, you suddenly realize there's loads of psychological things that you see that is going on between families and parents and being adopted and all that stuff. But what I learned from it is to be true to yourself. If you're true to yourself, then nobody's ever gonna— ever going to have— you know, you can fight with them, but it's your— it's your heart. You're being who you are. You're being authentic. You know, everyone talks about authenticity, and that's really important. It's different from different from your truth, which is a word which people are using a lot now. You know, they talk about their truth. That's a very different thing. That's, that's quite, I think, quite a manipulative word. Whereas to be truth, to be from your core truth, is about just who you are, your principles, the loves, dislikes, the hopes and the fears. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I find, Nick, is I talk to a lot of people about these pretty much every day, and most people don't know. So you've clearly, you know, you've had that upbringing, you've been surrounded by that, you've learned from what you've seen. So many people, when you ask them what's important to you, what do you value, what makes you tick, they don't know. And I think it's something to do with this sort of busy 24/7 life that we're, that we're living in, that we never take a pause to even consider that part of our identity. Yeah, like, how do I want to show up? So you show up unintentionally because of however you're processing in that moment in time. But it's so important, isn't it, just to just take that pause and that bit of discovery about you? Yes, I agree with you with the pausing. And I think it's so difficult at the moment with, you know, you, you watch Netflix, then suddenly you'll be on your laptop, then suddenly you'll go on to your TikTok, and you potentially aren't really thinking about you, your your environment, where you are. And so when you do have those moments, like I've just come back from walking the dog and, you know, put some Whitney Houston on and, and had a great walk. And I, you know, halfway through I just like, right, I need to actually breathe and take in the cold air. And you just suddenly go, wow, this is the first time all day I've actually spent a bit of time thinking about me rather than thinking about other things. Because when you go on your phone, you're you're looking at other people's lives, and so you're, you're emotionally or mentally kind of tapping into that, and it's really quite bad. I find it can be quite destructive, uh, and I think for a lot of people it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, there's so much we can talk about, but you said that word Netflix and it's just caught my brain because I know you're a well-known royal commentator as well, aren't you? So of course I have to ask you about your own insight opinions, your observations on Meghan and Harry. So what do you think, Nick? Is it— do you think— let me ask you a more specific question. Do you think Meghan has modeled herself on Diana, even subconsciously, as a sort of persecuted princess, which then means that Harry feels this need to protect her against everyone, even if that's his own family? Yes, I think— I mean, I'm— I, I was very good friends with Meghan Markle, so I was one of the first people to bring her to the UK, and we had a really great friendship. Uh, but you know, her nature of her brain, I think, was probably somebody who— they knew what they wanted and they would go for what they wanted. And so I was, I was kind of like a casualty of that because she didn't need me, uh, which— but I, I always liked her and I respected her. But I also saw, you know, the massive determination in her. I think the idea of creating this rather crazy sort of victim mentality is extremely damaging for people anyway, because if you perpetuate that, you obviously become it. And like you say, when you look at, uh, Prince Harry, um, and his mother— and, and incidentally, my mum died the same day as Prince Harry's mum did. It's, it's so bizarre. There's so many parallels. And their baby, Lilibet, was born on the 6th of May, which is my mum's birthday. It's insane. And I knew it's— there's a real weird relationship that I have with these brothers and their family, and vicariously it's just so crazy. Um, so when I see it, knowing of being a brother whose mother died suddenly— my mum died of a stroke, you know, literally in front of me and my brother— and, you know, so I know that immediate effect of grief. And obviously we grieved on the same day. Yeah, yeah. Uh, so there's a lot of stuff that I understand from that, is that I think that unfortunately she has played into this. And, you know, people talk about narcissism and they talk about, uh, separation, and people who are very powerful can separate. And I look at her and what she's done is she separated him from literally everybody. You know, and she separated herself. So it means that the truth, that, like I was saying before, their truth is a very different truth to the real truth that's really going on there. And the— and what gets to me is, for instance, in the documentary she talks about, um, how she was only allowed to wear beige or white or a color that wasn't a color. And I found found that very interesting because I actually went shopping with her. I went to Reiss, I went to Jigsaw, and I went to Topshop when we were in London together, when Topshop was massive. And she bought beige clothes, and she said to me, I love this color because it suits my skin tone, it's my favorite color. So for her then, with her truth, to weaponize color and you show— and against his family, or just against it in general, I found so manipulative. And when I watched it, I felt I was watching an infomercial for Meghan Markle, and I wasn't buying anything that she was selling. That's how I see it. Yeah, yeah. And I really like her, and I thought she was— she's got— she's a force for change. But when I watch it, I think, how can you be so— all of— both of you be so, um, what's the word, kind of— what's it called again? I mean, you just— they literally don't understand that there's so much going on in this world which is terrible, and they're sitting in Montecito in this massive world, and they've escaped the palace. It's like they are in the middle of a war zone. And I understand that media can be terribly dangerous, but these are words, and, you know, and they're not weapon— they are weapons, but they're not bombs. They're not, you know, they're And these are words, and they were amongst probably the most protected people in the world. And the way that they've made this truth of them being, you know, completely, you know, out to dry, I just don't buy it. And I think it's really unfortunate it's got to this level. I think though that, you know, one, one of the most important parts of it though, which I think is really positive, is the education about the Commonwealth and talking about, you know, systemic racism and, you know, how we have all been institutionalized and in, in that respect. And then, and there has to be a shift, there has to be a change, and that has to come from the top. Uh, but you can't, you can't blame people for it. You can make changes and you can urge people to make changes. And I think they probably would have made more change within the royal family than they are out of the royal family, but that's my opinion. The main thing, the main takeaway I take from that though was it was so boring, Elko. It was 6 hours of my life. I'd have rather watched, you know, cricket, you know what I mean? It was so dull. Yeah, yeah, they've got no— you know, their drama doesn't feel that dramatic. Yeah. Oh yeah, you got me there. I was also, you know, multitasking whilst I had it on in the background. You couldn't— it wasn't something that, that gripped you, but there was this— there is a compulsion to watch it. I think it's important to watch it, but they're not compelling. They're not interesting, they're not, they're not innovative, they're not special. That's their biggest problem, is it's like, guys, you really, you've got a title, but you're not that special a person. You don't inspire me. You have— I have— there's nothing that you have that I want. And I think that's, you know, they're not inspirational, they're not— there's nothing. And I think that's a real shame. And they, they think that they are are the most inspirational people out there, and they're not. And there's a sadness to that, isn't there? Yes, there is a sadness to that, especially when I've seen some of those images with, with Diana on there as well, and what the potential there was, and how this has all just shifted into a direction that doesn't even feel like it, it makes sense anymore. No, I wonder where it's going to go. Well, we'll see when the book comes out, and, and next year when you and I chat, I'm sure there'll be a, a movie on Hallmark with them in it. I love it. Now The other thing you mentioned as well, I'm going back to your mum as well and stroke and your absolute heart in charity and philanthropy. And I know Style4Stroke is something that you have a great heart in. So tell me about that, your drive for helping others, philanthropy, where does that come from and how do you do it? Well, my mum always said to me, it's not about writing a check, it's about holding a hand. And she said that from a very— Hold on, say that again. I mean, that's the statement. Charity is not about writing a check, it's about holding a hand. And my mum said that to me at a very early age, and it stuck with me forever. And I believe it. You know, there are people out there who can make and write checks for millions. I wanted to— when my mum passed away, I was 23. I'd never heard of a stroke. I didn't know what it was, and I wanted to tell and teach people about it. And so the best way to do it for me was through like fashion and through parties, and I threw lots of events and using celebrities that I had met on the way, you know, all, you know, literally door stopping and doorstepping people. I kind of was like, I just want you to come and support my work. And I did, you know, and you suddenly realize people have got amazing stroke stories that they talk about and, and they can hopefully empower others. But I think You know, Style for Stroke is a— we're a foundation, and basically what we do is we raise money, but we use fashion as a conduit to educate people about stroke. So as far as I'm concerned, if you buy a glamorous t-shirt and you give it to your child or your sister and they go, oh wow, I love this, it's from Style for Stroke, and they go, oh well, you know what, your aunt had a stroke, or your stroke is this, or— so that's kind of how I've done it. I get very frustrated with television because, you know, they decide what causes they want to promote. So for instance, if it's, I don't know, autism, or whether it's cancer, whether it's maybe children in need, etc., you know, some of these causes receive a lot of airtime. But when it comes to things like stroke, it gets nothing. And stroke is the third biggest killer in the world and the second— the largest cause of disability in the world. But people don't talk about it because it's not sexy. You know, you don't ever go— you know, with someone who's come over cancer, they're a survivor, they're a hero. When it's somebody who's had a stroke, they kind of a bit— if people feel sorry for them and they're a bit like, oh, you know, they don't know what to do. And I find that really frustrating. So, you know, it's taken me a long time, and it'll probably take a lot more time for people to sort of normalize stroke and kind of make it into something important. But, you know, I'm trying to do my best. Oh, and you're doing an incredible job because, you know, even simply sharing what you have on this show, as well as you say, you know, the third biggest killer, the highest level of disability. We always talk about living with cancer, but you're right, we don't hear about living with stroke. It is— you've made stroke stylish. It's time to make stroke sexy, I say. You know, not— yeah, I think it is to make it sexy. But you know, it's really interesting, one of the biggest frustrations I have is that you It is in comedy. Lots of comedians use stroke as a punchline, you know. They were like, oh, whatever, oh, she looked this way, she looked like she had a stroke, or whatever. Oh, I was so whatever, I had a stroke. And they make it as a punchline. And it's not just old-fashioned comedians, it's, it's people today who talk about it. They use it a lot. And they— and I, I am amongst people who may say, oh my God, her face is so weird, it looked like she had a stroke. They'll say that to me, and then I'll be like, okay, but you would never go, oh my God, her face is so weird, it looked like she had breast cancer, or looked like she had HIV. You would never say it. So why do you think that stroke should be something that is a punchline for a joke when it literally can change a whole family's life? Yeah. And it's not particularly curable. Yeah. So that really frustrates me. And again, you know, my imposter syndrome kicks in when I've got such a passion for it, but I suddenly think, oh, can I get— make more of a noise? But, you know, hopefully things like 'This will allow me to.' Oh, 100%. And, you know, some of that might be because the, the person with the stroke doesn't have the voice, because sometimes that's the effect. Yeah, you know, they can't respond back to any of that. So they need people like you as well to be the voice of stroke as well. You know, if you've, if you had a hard-hitting cancer, for most people you can respond back to that. If you've got HIV, if you have or some anything. But stroke is, it strips you of that in so many instances as well. So I completely, completely champion what you're doing as well, you know. Thank you, thank you for keeping going despite all that inner critic. Yeah, exactly. Well, yeah, yeah, 100%. But look, your career now, I know you've recently become Hello TV's presenter for their High Street Hits show. It's, uh, it's great. It's all about shoppable stuff, isn't it, where you're scouting out products and lifestyle products you can buy on the High Street. Are you enjoying that? What have you discovered in terms of what's out there? Oh, I love it. I do it with Andrea McLean, who was on Loose Women. We're great friends, and we just came together and thought, actually, it'd be really good to kind of encourage people to go back to the high street because people are not— they're not shopping. And it's great, you know, the high street not only is— or shopping centers aren't only hubs, they're also really great places for people to actually interact and chat and meet. You know, we kind of think to ourselves that they're going— people are going online and they're shopping, but actually it should be also about that sort of interaction. You know, when you go shopping to a shopping center like Meadowhall, you'll also go see a movie or you have a meal. And create that conversation and community, which is really kind of dissipating because of social media and because of, you know, Web3 and things like that. So that our show is just to encourage people to go shopping, what the best things to buy, get the best bargains, and to really just feel and look good. And, and it's— I love it. And Hello! Magazine is a fabulous magazine too. Oh, amazing, amazing. In fact, I was listening to Loose Women just recently. They were talking about, uh, online shopping versus high street shopping as well. But, you know, somehow the pandemic's kind of stripped us of that, and it's going to take— it takes a while to get back into that habit. And on the show they were talking about, you know, it's just almost so easy. You can try clothes on in the comfort of your own home, kind of tiny cubicles. So how do we get people back is, is the question. And you've raised loads of things, haven't you? It's not just about going shopping, it's about— it's about— yes, about community. I think you listen, I think they have to make the spaces more compelling. I think that's what they're doing. So, you know, you'll, for instance, there'll be Kidzania, where kids can go and spend the day and pretend they're firemen, et cetera, while you're off buying stuff. It's creating those experiences, giving people better offers. One of the things I worry about, obviously, is the metaverse as well. Because the metaverse is going to kick in. And people are going to be putting on their— going into their computers and feeling that they're in a shopping center and going to buy products. And that's almost like a midway between actually physically buying and buying and creating avatars which are you, and like you say, trying clothes on which will actually fit you. I find that quite scary. And again, I find it so— I find it very restrictive when it comes to conversation. It's a bit like how you— how now I hardly ever handwrite. I'm so worried you might get to a situation where people literally hardly communicate with each other verbally. Verbally because they are on their phones all the time, or they're in a virtual mall, or watching Avatar, but not talking to each other. You know, it's quite scary. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, you're so right. There's something, there's some lessons to be learned from the stuff we're already doing. Exactly that. We're doing this all day. My son, um, he's currently in Australia, and I've got this craving to handwrite him a letter. I don't just want to FaceTime him. I don't want to type him an email. I'm going to send him a handwritten letter. You're right. Look, where's the metaverse going? Are we all going to come full circle and have this craving to just be in each other's physical presence so much as well? So, uh, oh, I love that. So much we could carry on talking about. Um, let's try and wrap up a little bit. I don't want to stop talking to you, but, um, we're talking health and this is a health show. So tell me about when it comes to your health, what is it you're focusing on for yourself at the Well, I'm going to be 50 next year, so I have to— and actually, I only found out quite recently that I've got quite bad cholesterol, which is hereditary, so which is quite difficult to reduce. And obviously that scares me because of stroke and heart and all of those kind of things. And, you know, I think during lockdown I put on a lot of weight, which I found very hard to sort of shift. And, you know, you know, and I love a drink. So my big thing for next year, and literally as soon as Christmas Day is over I'm going to do it, is, is cut out the alcohol for at least 4 months. I'm going to really just go on a very, very sort of FODMAP, sort of low-calorie diet, exercise, try and run every day, and just kind of really sort of MOT myself, my body, I want to look good on my 50th. I want to feel fabulous. I want a six-pack. So let's see whether that happens. But I want to achieve something and feel good. And, you know, I want to have the physical— I want to be able to, you know, still be really strong for the rest of my life. So, and I know I need to make a few changes. I'm not— I am aware of that. So I think this is— I think when I had the blood test and it said about the cholesterol, which I never even knew about, I suddenly was like, right, I need to get on on this. Yeah, yeah. And you have to have a compelling reason, otherwise it's, you know, we hear all the time, resolution, resolution, set it, and then it's disappeared 6 weeks later when the honeymoon period is over. So this year has to be different for you because you've got to have a strong enough compelling— well, I've got a goal, it's my birthday, and I want, you know, so that's in May. So I think I feel like actually I'll have only let myself down and, you know, if I don't get to that. So it's a really good thing. I've even got one of those countdown clocks which I'm going to start start on the 1st of January and just go, there you go. And the one thing that I've tried, it's kind of— is it called Subterraneous Earth? Have you heard of it? Tell me. Basically a powder. Yeah, Subterraneous Earth. And it's really good for your, um, it's good for, for your cholesterol. And it's, it's very bizarre. It's a pill that you take and it's natural. And since I've been taking it, I've been feeling really good. And somebody told me about it. Oh yeah, they said to me that I was— my reflexologist was doing my— said my spleen was a bit weird. And so she said, take this supplement, and I have, and I feel like so much better. Oh, interesting. One, it's— I don't often say this, but it's not one that I've heard about, so I'm going to need to do some research on that because I think that the most important thing is You gotta know, like, you've got to know what— whatever you choose to put in your mouth, and we choose, right, is what is this actually doing for me? And what are you capturing about yourself, whether it's data, numbers, feeling, that tells you that this is the right thing for me? So if this is something for your cholesterol, then you've got to track it, Nick. You can't just say it, right? I feel good. Yeah, okay. It's way deeper, deeper than that. Know what it is today, know what it is after a month of, of taking this. I can't comment on it because I genuinely— That's really interesting. You're right. You know, the thing is, but that's the problem with— that's— I mean, we can go into this conversation about healthcare, etc. That's the problem when you— I tried lots of different statins and it made me feel so sick. All of them did. Yeah. And then I got— and then they said, okay, we'll send you to— because apparently there's a new injection that you can have, which is really good. And so I said, can I have that? And they said, well, we need to— you need to have a consultancy. So I got a letter and it's May 2023. Yeah, I just— I might be dead by then, but, you know, I just, you know, it's, it's, it's— yeah, it's very interesting. But I've got to be more conscious of that, and I am. And so that's my big resolution, is to have this goal for 50, to lose the weight, and to just get back to actually feeling good about myself. I think lockdown was very hard on a lot of people, and I think people don't realize that it's, it's harder to bounce back than people think. And I don't— I still don't think we're out of it. I think there's a lot, you know, working from home and, you know, different things. It's changed everything, and I, I— we can't go back, so we just have to go forward. Yeah, yeah. No, 100%. Well, you know, there's a lot of accountability in this, uh, audience. Yeah, exactly. I've done it now. I know, like, oh my God, it's out there. It's got his very vocals now. He's gonna see the world in a different way. And exactly, and Alka is going to be calling me up going, how are you getting on? Yeah, 100%. Well, I don't want you —talking of glasses—is just go into any of this blind. Like, we don't do this on this show. This is about, you know, really understanding yourself, your bio data, tracking, testing, transforming. That's the way you're going to get to, to where you want. It's not about the pill. Look, you know, these things might help. Of course there's a place for it. Yeah, make sure you're doing it at the right place and not at the detriment of ignoring everything else, which you're not. You're kind of, you know, ready to shape up, which is, um, which is amazing. So Love that. Any final words that you would love to share, Nick? Just, you know, I think it's important, as I said before, to be true to yourself. And to, you know, we've all got goals. And also, I get knocked back, you know, monthly, daily, weekly on ideas I have or things I do. And now it's like water off a duck's back. I'm like, okay, fine. If they don't see it, they might see it tomorrow. So never give up, literally never give up, because you— if you look at— I look at somebody like Morgan Freeman, for instance, the actor. He started being an actor at the age of 70, you know what I mean? Like, he was somebody who wanted to do it. Now he is it, and now he's, you know, he's an institution. He's fantastic. So I think there's no— there's no right or wrong age, and just get— if you want to do something, do it. And also, if you want to be an artist and go and paint, go and paint, you know, just do what you want to do. Do what makes you feel happy, because we only have one life to do it. Oh, powerful, powerful words. Do what makes you happy. We've got one life to do it. It's yours to do what you choose with it, so make it count, right? Yes, definitely. Ah, thank you so much, Nick. It has been my privilege. I've loved this conversation. Thank you for being you. Oh, thank you so much for having me. What a lovely conversation. I'm I'm feeling so moved by Nick. I don't know why. I think it's just his honesty and his vulnerability that's making me feel, well, quite reflective, I must say, and quite pensive as well. What a wonderful human. Oh, an interesting revelation about Meghan Markle and beige clothes as well, don't you think? Now, I know if you haven't watched the Harry Meghan series, it's not going to make much sense, but if you have, then that was a bit of a jaw-drop moment. All that stuff about her having to wear beige and not being allowed to clash color. Uh, she likes wearing beige, maybe nothing to do with any royal rules. Oh, and then, and then Nick throws in the bit about his high cholesterol and his, and his mom with her stroke at a young age. And I mean, oh, come on, Nick, my doctor radar is now on high alert for you. I think what you said was subterraneous earth. I think that's That's what he said he was taking, wasn't it? Now look, I have no idea what that is, so I will have to quiz him some more and find out some more. But there is a herb called Rubus coreanus. Do you think that's what he meant? So with this herb, Rubus coreanus, there was a randomized controlled trial that was done in 2020 on 77 people who had raised cholesterol. Now, half the group received freeze-dried extract of this herb, Rubus coreanus, 600mg, and the other half they received a placebo. And the results found that the group taking the herb did have a significant reduction in their total cholesterol and in their LDL cholesterol. So it might be something to explore. So maybe that's what he was talking about, subterraneous ubus coreanus. I'm gonna have to follow up with him, do my research, find out more, and I will update you next week. But talking of supplementation, I do want to give a shout out to today's show sponsor, Youth and Earth. Now they have a great krill oil supplement to provide high levels of omega-3. And again, looking at some of the research, there's a meta-analysis that was done of over 149,000 Participants. It was published in 2021, and it showed that omega-3 fatty acids can reduce cardiovascular mortality and improve cardiovascular outcomes. So that's things like heart disease, heart attack, stroke as well. So do check out the special link from Youth and Earth in the show notes, which is just for listeners for this show, if you want to find out more about their products. But look, if you are listening and you're worried about high cholesterol, about stroke, and you want to talk about medication, supplementation, lifestyle approaches, what to measure, what to track, then do get in touch with me. You know how to reach me through my website, dralcapatel.com, or through my socials @DrAlcapatelUK. We're now going to take a short break, and when we return, I'll share with you this week's 3 health activating hacks. Tags. In the break, you're going to hear some music from friend of the show, Justin M'Kirk, entitled Through the Eyes of a Child. This track features on Justin's 2012 album, Take Your Place, and it's available to download from justinm'kirk.co.uk. Everyone I meet. I try so hard not to be the judge of who or what they are. Not the color of their skin or where they gonna pray. For we are all the same at the end of the day. I wish I could see the world through the eyes of a child. Where everything is innocent and everything is fair. Yeah, yeah. I wish I could see the world through the eyes of a child. Welcome back. That was the wonderful Justin Mccurk, and you are listening to Health Hacktivators with me, Dr. Alka Patel. And now for this week's 3 health hacktivating hacks. Are you ready to unlock your health hacktivation code in 3 steps? Data, devices, decisions. Now this week I was in deep conversation with Nick Eady. We talked a lot about imposter syndrome as well as things like instinct and resilience, and Nick also gave us his personal views on the Harry and Meghan debacle. We also talked about stroke and cholesterol, so if you haven't listened, go listen. Nick is such a lovely person, and you know what, I felt very moved speaking to him. Now, there were so many topics in our conversation that I could easily take a deep dive into, but I'm going to save them for future shows. And so today, today's health hacks, I want to focus on imposter syndrome. Imposter syndrome. Well, look, it is common, isn't it, for us to have moments of doubt or fear, but imposter syndrome results in a rising in stress and a debilitating drop in self-confidence so that you end up somehow shrouded in self-doubt. And why is then this a problem? Well, it is a problem because it can then hold you back. It can affect your friendships, your relationships, your work, your success. It can affect the opportunities that you choose to take or or not take. So let me give you a bit of history, a bit of history on imposter syndrome. So it was first introduced back in 1978 by two clinical psychologists, Dr. Pauline Clance and Dr. Suzanne Imes. And what they did was they conducted a study on 150 female students, and they found that many of them thought of themselves as imposters. Now the paradox here was that they were all highly accomplished individuals. They'd all received significant praise from their colleagues. So imposter syndrome means that even with accomplishments and achievements and positive praise, you feel like a fraud. You feel like you shouldn't be in the position that you're in, or you shouldn't be doing what you're doing, or you're worried that at some point you'll get found out by other people for not being quite as great as they think you are. And the result of all of this is that you end up either overworking or over-procrastinating, and all of this is to avoid your fear. Now, my view has been— and I say has been— my view has been that perhaps imposter imposter syndrome shouldn't be used as a term. A syndrome? What is that about? And what I have felt is that it is more important to get to the underlying root of issues, which in the case of imposterism, it stems from perfectionism and fear. It's fear that's right at the root. But you know what, I speak to clients almost on a daily basis about their imposter syndrome, and although imposter syndrome, it isn't a recognized medical term, what I do now recognize is that I understand how this container, this container that you're holding your fear in, this container called imposter syndrome, can help you. It can help you to just make more sense of it, and then when you can make sense of it, you can then change it. This container can help you feel more connected to, to those who have or are experiencing the same. It can help you to talk more openly about it, just like we heard Nick do, and be more candid about the impact on your emotional health because it's been estimated that, what, about 60-70% of people have felt imposterism during their life. So that means there's all the more reason to shine a light on it, doesn't it? And I've seen imposter syndrome raising its head in many, many different situations, many different settings including academic settings, in the workplace, in relationships, in social interactions. It's sometimes been called social anxiety syndrome. Nick referenced this in our conversation earlier, and it's triggered in, again, lots of different situations, sometimes when you're facing new challenges or sometimes when you're already doing things that you're accustomed to doing. And what I do know is that imposter syndrome has no boundaries. Boundaries. It is common in high achievers. So here's a question: what do David Bowie and Michelle Obama have in common? Not a trick question because at some point they have both held the belief that they're frauds. They've held the belief that their success is down to luck and nothing to do with talent. In other words, they've both experienced imposter syndrome. And I'm going to add a name to this list that might surprise you: Albert Einstein. Albert Einstein! He won a Nobel Prize. He's one of the most influential scientists in history. I mean, he's got the best hair in the world, and even he referred to himself as an involuntary swindler, and he suggested that his work didn't deserve the acclaim it received. Does any of this sound familiar? Well, look, how do you know? How do you know if imposter syndrome is your new critical best friend, or your critical best friend that's always been with you? Well, look, although I've as I said, it's not a medical diagnosis, it has been studied and Dr. Valerie Young, she's studied fraudulent feelings amongst high achievers and she's postulated that there are 5 types of imposter. So what are these? Well, there's the perfectionist who fixates on their flaws, there's the natural genius who sets the highest of standards, Then there's the Soloist who does not like asking for help, the Expert who never feels good enough despite their achievements, and then the Super Person who's always trying to prove themselves. So which one could you be? Well, look, let's now then move into looking at your data in order to answer that question. Now, in the research field, there are a number of validated scoring systems and assessments which have been used in research to look at imposter syndrome. So to make this more accessible, what I have done is develop a scoring system for you. It's based on the research and the work of Dr. Pauline Clance and of Dr. Valerie Young as well. And it's a a system that you can use to gauge your degree of imposterism because once you know your number, you know that you can then shift the needle because remember, if you test it, then you can tame it. So I've put a link to the test in the show notes for you to take. And then what? Well, once you've got your data, your number, how can you shift the needle? What devices can you use to help? Okay, a device for imposter syndrome. Hmm, is there one? Well, look, being able to identify your thoughts associated with imposter syndrome is an important, important starting point. You know the thoughts I'm talking about: I'm not good enough, I'll be found 'out,' 'I don't deserve this,' 'I'm a fraud,' 'I'm not perfect.' Become aware of your thoughts. Notice them. Name them. And allowing your thoughts to just be present and then letting them go without giving them weight or giving them meaning, allowing yourself to neutralize them, that is a a skill that you can learn. Now I'm qualified in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy and coaching. It's about helping people to accept that life can be hard, maybe it's meant to be hard, accepting that life can be hard but yet you can still commit to living a fulfilled and values-driven life. Now this is very, very helpful when it comes to to imposter syndrome. Now you're probably wondering, where am I going with this? Where am I going with this when it comes to devices? Well, the device that I'm talking about is your phone and more specifically apps on your phone. Apps which have very specific mindfulness or meditation practices or visualizations on them specific for imposter syndrome. Now, Headspace have one which I would suggest listening to, so I'll put the link for that in the notes and on my blog as well on imposter syndrome. I'll share other apps and other links as well, and I'll also put on the blog much more specific ways to lessen this load of imposter syndrome, so do make sure to click that link, uh, right to the blog as well. So that's data and devices. What about when it comes to Part 3 of the Health Activation Code: Decisions. Now, your decision for what to do next is based on the question, is imposter syndrome holding me back or propelling me forward? Does it hinder me or does it help me? So if you don't feel worthy of your achievements, if you're hearing a lot of negative self-talk, if you're avoiding situations due to fear, or you're just missing out on opportunities and you're noticing that life is starting to feel narrow instead of full, and you decide, you make the decision that you do not want imposter syndrome to hold you back, well, here's 3 strategies that will help you to overcome the limitations. They're my 3 ABCs. So A for Acknowledge. Just acknowledge what you're feeling. And I say this because emotional agility, it's not about knowing how to get rid of your feelings, but it's more about just giving them space. Because maybe it's hard to know, to know if you're if your fears have grounded you or if they've held you back. And we heard from Nick Eady earlier, didn't we, that what he's done is to recognise his fears, to acknowledge them, to accept them. Because fear is a feeling that will propel you into an action. So then move on to B for build. What do I mean by build? By build, I mean build an understanding of what matters to you, what your values are. Know why you do what you do. Know what strengthens you. And then showcase your values. So I call this flavour and savour. Flavour your day with what's important to you. So think of it this way. I'm I'm the sort of woman who's caring, or I'm the kind of guy who's capable, or I'm the sort who's playful. And then be caring, capable, or playful through your day. Flavour your day with that value. And then in the evening, just look back and savour those moments when those values appeared, when those values shone through. Despite your fears. That is what makes for a great day. And finally, C. C is for challenge. Challenge your doubts because they will keep creeping in. That's what your mind is designed to do to keep you safe. So thank your mind for wanting to keep you safe, for sending you doubts, and then challenge your mind. Ask yourself for a better thought. Brain, give me a better thought. And it will, it will give you a better thought that can then take you from criticism to compassion. So there you have it. That is your Health Activation Code for Imposter Syndrome: Data, Devices, Decisions.: Take the test in the show notes for your imposter syndrome score—that's your data—and then use apps like Headspace to give space for your thoughts—that's your devices—and then make a decision. Make a decision about your actions based on the question: does imposter syndrome hinder me or help me? I hope you have enjoyed today's unlocking of your health activation code. Tell me what action you are taking. I would love to hear from you, and I wish you a health activating day. Thank you for listening to Health Activators. If you have enjoyed this episode, then please support the show by leaving us a 5-star review wherever you get your podcasts and by sharing this episode with a friend. Don't forget to click the link in the show notes right now to find out more details about what was covered in this episode and to connect with Dr. Alka Patel in order to take your strategic self-care to the next level. Please do support today's show partner, Youth and Earth. Youth and Earth have a range of products that I love to use myself to supercharge my metabolism, to support my health, and to slow down cellular aging. Aging. Just be sure you click the link in the show notes for exclusive offers which Youth and Earth are so generously giving for listeners of this show. Thank you for listening to Health Activators with me, Dr. Alka Patel, on the Women's Radio Station. I'd love you to stay connected through the socials. You can find me at Dr. Alka Patel UK. And to learn more about the Women's Radio Station, do give them a follow too on their socials at Women's Radio STN.